Professor: I was house-sitting for them. I almost strangled the cat.
Oberlin, Ohio
Overheard by: Secret Spy
Archive for the ‘Teachers’ Category
You Sure Those Were Judas's Last Words?
Professor: And he's like, “Jesus, I wish I was pagan!”
Memorial University
Newfoundland
Canadia
Overheard by: Mel
She Doesn’t Even Recognize Our Sincere and Unyielding Love for Children
Pre-school teacher #1: Which kids do you want in your group today?
Pre-school teacher #2: Oh, I don’t really care. Just not Monica*. I cant stand her.
Pre-school teacher #1: Yeah, I know. It’s like it’s her period every friggin’ day!
Pre-school teacher #2: Yeah, she’s such a little frigid bitch!
New York City, New York
Overheard by: first day on the job
If Moon Is Full for More Than Four Hours, Consult a Physician
Ninth grade English teacher: I mean, it isn’t just like, ‘Wee, the man in the moon is gettin’ laid!’
Newton North High School
Newton, Massachusetts
Figures a Robot Would Be Teaching Sex Ed
Professor, hitting mic and causing feedback: Oops, sorry. [Whispering to self] It’s my android nature.
Human Sexuality class, UCSC
Santa Cruz, California
And Make Our Points Without Using the Word “Whatever”
Girl in anthropology class: So… Islam says that men can marry four wives, but women can only marry one husband. Whatever.
Professor: Let's try to maintain some cultural relativism!
Collegeville, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: nina
Note to Self: Don't Try to Bond with Teenagers.
Teacher to girl: I like your shirt!
Girl: Oh, yeah, but it's from a show, so I'm not, like, just wearing a shirt… randomly or whatever.
Boulder, Colorado
That, or a Phone.
Teacher: Who knows what the word “cell” means?
4th-grader: Oh, I do, I do! It's a tiny thing like a jelly doughnut! Except instead of jelly, there's blood!
Elementary School
Washington, DC
Goddamn Lungfish!
Property professor: They’re only on the land about 25 days a year, and they get full possession? ‘What the fuck?!’ as they say!
http://overheardinlawschool.blogspot.com/
Overheard by: sa
None Of Which Are All That Hard
Student: Have you ever heard of the penis game?
Female professor: Which one? I've played many penis games.
Greek Myth Class
Illinois Wesleyan University
Overheard by: problem