Professor: Okay, let’s review. What’s it called when you put geological events in sequential order?
Basketball star #1: Calligraphy!
Basketball star #2: Naw dude, that’s writing.
Basketball star #1: Oh yeah…that’s what the Egyptians did, huh?
Basketball star #2: Naw, that’s hieroglyphics, man.
Professor: The answer is “stratigraphy.” Let’s move on quickly.
Geology 101
Mesa, Arizona
Overheard by: YeahKey
Meathead professor: And they climaxed in August, in all their climactic glory!
Chicago, Illinois
Professor, throwing exams on desk the day after taking them: I graded all of these. I want applause.
(class applauds)
UMass
Amherst, Massachusetts
Fashionista student: So is he like, Christian gay from project runway?
Oblivious teacher: No, he’s like Jewish gay.
American University
Washington, DC
Overheard by: I’m Jewish
History professor, lecturing on the early 1900s: I mean, the problem of being the only person with a telephone is, well, who you gonna call?
Class, as one: Ghostbusters!
History professor: You kids scare me.
CU
Boulder, Colorado
Overheard by: They know their history, alright
Photography professor: Yeah, I did this whole series about raves when I was in Tucson… I even dyed my hair yellow and shaved a daisy into it because, you know, I was “submersing myself in the culture.” But that was a long time ago. Now I’m a teacher. Go figure, huh?
Photography Class
Phoenix, Arizona
Overheard by: Katie
Art history TA: This print depicts the sacrifice of Isaac, which is a biblical story where God told Abraham to kill his first-born son.
Bimbette: Oh. My. God. That’s… terrible! That’s almost as bad as a girl telling her boyfriend that he needs to get rid of his dog because she’s allergic.
http://overheardatcornell.blogspot.com/2006/11/halloween-mania-part‑2.html
Overheard by: mary
Girl: Everyone knows Barbie is disproportional. Look! She has no butt! And her waist is tiny.
[Pause.]Professor: I bet black Barbie has a big butt.
Los Angeles, California
Professor: The researchers were trying to see whether or not subjects would react to taboo words. Of course, this was in 1940, so the words they used were things like ‘whore,’ ‘penis,’ and ‘Kotex.’
Widener University
Chester, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: I heart grad school
Student: The trophoblast looks like a teething ring!
Sex ed teacher: Yes. It looks like a teething ring, but it’s not.
UW Rock County
Janesville, Wisconsin
Overheard by: Akuaku
Hat Tip 🎩 to The Marketing Scientist
