Middle-aged American tourist woman: The rooms here have strange plugs, I simply cannot use my curling iron! This is outrageous… I want to see the manager immediately!
Hotel Restaurant
Munich
Germany
Overheard by: Dru
Archive for the ‘Technology’ Category
We’d Be Wide Awake, but Our Cards Would Be Stained
Guy playing magic card game with a bunch of friends: All I’m saying is that somewhere, in an alternate universe, there is a table producing coffee!
Clark College
Vancouver, Washington
Hope You Bitches Saved Me Some Weed
Mom: Why is the tv on with the mute on?
Daughter #1: Cause of the pretty moving pictures!
Daughter #2: Yeah! It's like an aquarium, but with Tom Hanks.
Upper Hutt
New Zealand
Overheard by: Kat
Be Careful It Doesn’t Squirt You in the Eye
Guy on cell: Now turn it on and set it to cow mode… Right, but be sure it’s in cow mode… No, you’ll know when it’s in cow mode.
Kroger Grocery
Conway, Arkansas
Overheard by: Not sure I want to know
Imagine That.
Smokin' hot Filipina girlfriend: My friend said that I should use Photoshop and imagination to do this. I have Photoshop, but where can I get imagination? I've never heard of it.
White boyfriend: You're kidding me, right?
Smokin' hot Filipina girlfriend: What?
White boyfriend: There is no software called “imagination.” Just use your imagination. Duh!
Smokin' hot Filipina girlfriend: You're so not getting a blowjob tonight.
Toronto
Canadia
Overheard by: The white boyfriend
Woody Allen Was Pretty Much the Same As a Kid
Three-year-old to mom on bus: Mom, can you show me how to play my dvd?
Mom: Sure. Why are you asking me now?
Three-year-old: In case.
Mom: In case? In case of what?
Three-year-old, matter of factly: In case you die.
Madrid
Spain
Also to Make Julienne Fries
Freshman #1: I really use a time machine.
Freshman #2: What for?
Freshman #1: Time travel, dumbass.
Northwestern University
Illinois
Figures a Robot Would Be Teaching Sex Ed
Professor, hitting mic and causing feedback: Oops, sorry. [Whispering to self] It’s my android nature.
Human Sexuality class, UCSC
Santa Cruz, California
That's What You Said About Menstruation!
Professor: How does a microwave work?
Student: Electromagnetic waves.
Professor: Oh, “electromagnetic waves”! That's a fancy way of saying “magic.”
University of Delaware
Overheard by: Magician
Which Is Why Robot Sex Is the Wave Of the Future
Guy in bicycle to another, intensely: People like to be artificially stimulated.
Encino, California