Teenage girl to friend, giggling: So then she said she was going to put diarrhea on my face!
Toronto
Canadia
Archive for the ‘Teens’ Category
You Think I Don’t Dream About Them at Night?
Teen girl #1: I have pomegranate green tea at home.
Teen girl #2: Oh my god! Just think of the antioxidants!
Charlottesville, Virginia
Overheard by: local woman
And His Cousins’ Friend’s Stomach Exploded from Pop Rocks
High school freshman: I once knew a guy who knew a guy who was a cyclops!
Kenosha, Wisconsin
How the Economy Works: Explained
Teen girl #1: Omigawd, I just realized. If we borrowed five dollars from like twenty people, we’d have eighty dollars!
Teen girl #2: Haha, yeah! Wait. (long pause) Yeah, like eighty dollars!
St Louis, Missouri
Overheard by: Had hope for a second, there
No Wonder It’s Spreading So Fast
Teen #1 coming out of arrival gate to friend: So, when do we start coughing, sneezing and squealing to freak people out?
Teen #2: Dude, people with the swine flu don’t squeal!
Teen #1: Then why the hell do they call it that?
Teen #2, jokingly: Because you have to fuck a pig to get it?
Teen #1, seriously: Well, that makes sense!
Logan Airport
Boston, Massachusetts
Which Is What You Get for Forcing a Dog into a Tutu
Teen girl: Yeah… But, I mean, he peed on her! He lifted up his skirt and peed on her!
Hinsdale Central High School
Hinsdale, Illinois
Overheard by: Christina Newkirk
Have You Learned So Little from The Sweetest Thing?
Teen girl in bathroom #1: I’d hate to be a guy and have to use a urinal.
Teen girl in bathroom #2: Oh yeah, that thing looks unsanitary.
Teen girl in bathroom #1: Not even that, but like if you had to go poop then everyone would know it.
Teen girl in bathroom #3: You can’t poop in a urinal?
High School
Coral Springs, Florida
If You Want Sex from the Girl’s Perspective, Consider Prison
Teenage boy to teenage girl: I wish I could get in the car with lesbians… Wait, no, I don’t.
Tinton Falls, New Jersey
You Are the Weakest Link. Goodbye.
Spanish teacher: And you really have to be careful what you eat, because they have a lot of E. Coli problems.
Teenage girl: E. Coli? Like in those commercials with the cough drops?
Spanish teacher: What?
Teenage girl: Y’know, like the “Eeee-coliiii…”
Jersey Shore High School
Pennsylvania
Overheard by: shana yo mamma
When You Get Bitten by Something Radioactive
Teen boy to friend: I guess what I’m trying to say is… I really want to be your sidekick.
NCG Cinemas
Lansing, Michigan
