Archive for the ‘Texting’ Category

I Was All, “But I’m Tex­ting You!”

Young col­lege girl #1: How was your date last night?
Young col­lege girl #2: Okay. I don’t think I’m go­ing out with him again, though.
Young col­lege girl #1: Why?
Young col­lege girl #2: He was weird. He asked me to quit tex­ting while we were hav­ing din­ner.
Young col­lege girl #1: Rude!

Star­buck­’s
Fayet­teville, Arkansas

Your Ed­i­tors Have a Soft Spot for Girls Who Say “Suit­ors”

Slut­ty look­ing girl: I want to send a bul­letin to all my male suit­ors: “you will not be get­ting in­to my pants by tex­ting me and ask­ing me to give you a back mas­sage. The bum who told me god did a beau­ti­ful job mak­ing my legs this morn­ing had a bet­ter chance.”

Ogilvie Train Sta­tion
Chica­go, Illi­nois

Bob Dole: “Not to Men­tion the Shame Of Tex­tu­al Dys­func­tion.”

Guy #1: Hey, broth­er, can I ask you some­thing? What is text mes­sag­ing?
Guy #2: You don’t know what that is?
Guy #1: No… I was at this club the oth­er night, and this fly young ho gave me dig­its and asked me to text her.
Guy #2: Damn, broth­er, you’re gonna have to get your nephew to teach you tex­ting. It’s al­most like e‑mail, but on your cell phone. It has re­ply — now or lat­er, and for­ward, if you wan­na send it on to a broth­er.
Guy #1: I guess. I nev­er heard of it be­fore.
Guy #2: Yeah, nig­ga, if you wan­na kick it with these young bitch­es you got­ta learn to text.
Guy #1: How times have changed.
Guy #2: I know it, broth­er… Next thing you know, they’re gonna be tex­tin’ you in bed. Text you their moans and shit. It is go­ing to be the down­fall of mak­ing love.

Restau­rant, Long Is­land Mar­riott
New York

Over­heard by: Stephen