Boy: Have you seen Rainman?
Friend: Nah.
Boy: Ohmigod, I can’t believe you haven’t seen Rainman! I mean I haven’t seen Rainmanbut I can’t believe you haven’t seen Rainman!
Newcastle-Sydney Train
Australia
Archive for the ‘Train’ Category
I’m Not Sure Hocking Your VCR Quite Counts
Thuggish teen to friends: Yeah, I’m going antiquing this weekend. For at least an hour.
Orange Line Train
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Julianna
We Better Just Get Off the Train, Mom
Tourist lady, as train approaches the end of the line: So how are they going to turn this train around?
Daughter: They don’t have to. It can go in either direction.
Tourist lady: Well, are they at least going to turn the seats around?
Subway
Washington, DC
And I’d Lose the Best Piano Teacher I’ve Ever Had
Guy #1: I woke up in her bed without any pants.
Guy #2: What happened?
Guy #1: I think we had sex.
Guy #2: You don’t know?
Guy #1: I cant exactly remember. Luckily neither can she. She’d kill me if she knew.
Train
Sydney, Australia
And You Thought Picking Up Girls at Funerals Was Bad
Girlfriend on packed, stopped train: I’m bored. Tell me a story.
Boyfriend: I remember the first time I saw you…you were crying…sitting outside the abortion clinic. I gave you my hankie.
Yellow Train
Washington, DC
Overheard by: entertained next to them
I Don’t Care If It Is Cardboard
50-something man to 50-something woman: You are not homeless. Homeless people don’t own dinnerware!
BART Train
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Morpheus
Ah, the Ever-Effective Nuremberg Defense!
Guido to skinny guy on métro: So you weren’t really grabbing her boobs. That’s just following instructions. (pause) You were just being a team player, man.
Vendôme Métro
Montréal
Canadia
Why Some Kids Wet the Bed
Mother to five-year-old: Keep moving, we don’t want to be in the first car. If the train crashes, we’d be done for.
Metro North Railroad
New York City, New York
Overheard by: BOB Sled
…in Exchange for Cooking Lessons
Conductor: This train will terminate at Stratford. The next station is Waterloo. Please change here for the Bakerloo, Northern and Waterloo & City lines. Alternatively you can also change for Waterloo International, catch the next Eurostar, go to Paris and show the French how to play rugby.
London
England
Overheard by: kat
Otherwise It’ll Just Get Made Into McNuggets
Scruffy man with garbage bag to stranger: Want to buy some chicken breast?
Blue Line Train
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
