Whispering mom: Don’t play with your skirt like that. You know what you forgot this morning.
Three-year-old, loudly: Panties!
Dunkin’ Donuts
Virginia
Overheard by: callumny
Archive for the ‘Undies’ Category
…While You’re Working As a Mall Santa.
Husband: I’m good at finding little kids’ panties.
Wife: That’s not a quality that you should announce.
Jersey City, New Jersey
I Don’t Know Whether To Laugh, Say “Awww.…”, Call DSS, Or Puke In My Mouth
Lady on cell: Just because she’s wearing big-girl panties doesn’t mean she’s not your baby.
Target
Midwest City, Okahoma
I’m Saving Those for the Yearbook
Ambiguous boy, yelling to friend across hall: And no pictures of me without pants!
High School
Nashville, Tennessee
…And Haven’t We All Been There?
Woman on cell in department store: She’s probably trading food for underwear.
Cincinnati, Ohio
Overheard by: Leslie
Is a Frilly Lace Thong Too Much to Ask?
Four-year-old boy: I said, all I want is underwear!
Banana Republic
Smithfield, North Carolina
Overheard by: Bryan
The Snake Was Shedding Her Skin
Girl #1: I saw her panties.
Girl #2: What?
Girl #1: Oh, they were off of her, not on her.
Woodbridge, Virginia
Oh, Please– Victoria’s Secret’s Been Selling Those for Years.
Girl, about teacher: He kept bending over in front of my desk. And he was wearing these tie-dye boxers, and they were hanging out of his pants. Except it looked like a thong. Like, there was a thong line. So, yeah, he might have been wearing a thong.
Girl #2: Maybe it’s like a weird, secret guy thing. The top looks like boxers but the rest is a thong.
Girl #1: Yeah.
High School
Columbia, Missouri
The Mormon Missionaries Were Only Too Happy to Obey
Female college student: Why are you wearing underwear? I don’t wear underwear. I’m a dancer. You are not a dancer. What are you even doing here? You’re not a real dancer. You’re an elf. And you’re going to wear panties like an elf.
Chicago, Illinois
Threesome-Resistant Boys Are Sadly Common in Oregon
Whiny girl to female friend, showing a polka-dotted bra: Come on! I’m trying to show you my boobs!
Boy, lifting his shirt: The only boobs she wants to see are mine!
Eugene, Oregon
