Youngish girl to pair of friends: My vagina is ruined after last night.
Melbourne
Australia
Archive for the ‘Vagina’ Category
Nobody Can Do Sexual Harassment Like the Insane
Crazy bag lady, loudly: I don’t suck dick for pussy! I don’t suck dick for pussy! I don’t suck dick for pussy!
(sits down next to another passenger on the subway)
Crazy bag lady, now in passenger’s face: I don’t suck dick for pussy!
(female passenger gets up and moves)
Crazy bag lady: Why you jumping? Why you jumping, bitch!? You weren’t jumpin’ last night when that guy put his long ass dick in you last night!
Female passenger: Excuse me, ma’am, don’t say that to me! You don’t know me!
(subway train stops)
Conductor: City Hall station!
Female passenger: Excuse me, sir, there’s a crazy lady on the subway harassing the other passengers.
Conductor: Oh, could you point her out to me?
(female passenger points to crazy woman yelling)
Conductor: Ma’am, are you bothering people?
Crazy bag lady: Why you tryin’ to fuck me standing up!? Why don’t you fuck me lying down like a gentleman!
Conductor: Ma’am, I’m calling the police.
Broad Street Line Subway
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Your Editors Are Not Proud Of Having Seen This
Confused-sounding girl on cell: I could fit an orange in my vagina?
Leamington Spa
England
Overheard by: Bleep
Stick Something Weird in Your Penis, Then
20-something girl: If I had a penis I wouldn’t know what to do with it. Awkward.
20-something guy: If I had a vagina I’d stick all kinds of weird stuff in it all the time!
Salt Lake City, Utah
Overheard by: akvinsc
That Self-Exam Footage Is Going to Save Lives
Chick: If someone as good-looking as my brother is talking about your vagina, you’re doing something right.
Waffle House
Hagerstown, Maryland
Overheard by: Stephanie
It Needs Watering, If You Follow Me
Woman on phone: As long as she can wear it without showing her lady garden, then that’s fine by me.
Christchurch
New Zealand
That Thing Almost Took Off My Hand Last Time
Student #1: Jess, come here. I need your help.
Student #2: I am not touching your cooter again.
Smith College
Northampton, Massachusetts
Why Is That Always Your Question?
College girl: I really want to go as Superman!
Friend: You aren’t going to stuff your crotch, are you?
Melbourne University
Australia
Since Barenaked Ladies Was Already Taken
Twenty-something dude: When I grow up, and learn how to play an instrument, I’m calling my band he-gina and she-nis.
McKenna’s
Baltimore, Maryland
The Keebler Elves Say They Need the Yeast
Drunk girl to drunk friend: Unless you live in my vagina, you wouldn’t know!
Springfield, Illinois
Overheard by: Random Bar Guy
