But She Didn’t Use Their Blood As Paint This Time!

Sober girl: Look, all I’m saying is, I wouldn’t fucking mess with her. She’s clinically insane.
Drunk girl: But you know, I think she’s really smart. There are those people, you know, that are so smart they’re like actually crazy… Real mental, and we just think they’re weird, but they’re not! They have like, an IQ of 200!
Sober girl: You do realize that she drew pictures of her friends decapitated, right?

Wellington
New Zealand

Overheard by: Were they talking about the same person?

They Both Swear They’re Straight

Middle aged man: Hey, Jesse! Wanna wrestle?
Shirtless young man: I’ll wrestle you if you give me a Jägerbomb!
Middle aged man: You better hurry, we’re running out!

Traverse City, Michigan

The Clerks There Have Turned It into an Annual Sporting Event

Haughty woman: Oh yeah, he’s getting a divorce.
Friend: Why?
Haughty woman: She stalks him ever since he left. She followed him into Walgreens and tried to beat him down with a toilet scrubber!

Indianapolis, Indiana

Overheard by: I would want a divorce too…

Oooh — And Graphic Intolerance!

Mom: No, that’s not an appropriate video, either.
14-year-old son: What about this one? It’s Christian. It only has violence in it!

Blockbuster
Liberty, Missouri

Overheard by: blockbuster lurker

I’d Totally Do That If It’d Make Me Young Again

Middle-aged woman, about teenager: She’s so beautiful. She could be a model. (pause) I want to run her over with my car.

Bellingham, Washington

But It’s Just a Cornish Game Hen

Professor: It must seem like I’m beating you over the head with a frozen chicken breast.

Hartford, Connecticut

Overheard by: Claire

That’s What Everyone Says. And Everyone Lies.

Woman: I’d rather do the kidnapping than be kidnapped.
Man, snorting in disbelief: Oh, puh-lease!

Boston, Massachusetts

Overheard by: MarthaQ

Grandma Brought Me the Wrong Bag Lunch

Chick: I got, like, suspended three times in five days.
Coworker: I only got suspended once, but that was just ’cause I cut this bitch with a razor.
Chick, to customer: Thank you, sir.

McDonald’s
Dunwoody, Georgia

Overheard by: blur

I Stowed It in the Crawl-Space with Your Dignity

Mom: I don’t wanna be finding knives in the lawn anymore!
20-year-old son: Where’s my sword?

San Diego, California

Overheard by: tab

Which Is the First Rule Of Lesbian Fight Club

Artsy emo: It was like lesbian Fight Club! First Leema liked Holly, then she liked Tracy, who liked Nicola, who also liked Holly. So Nicola and Leema got in a fist fight and in the end, Tracy and Holly had sex in the woodshop classroom!

Toronto
Canadia

Overheard Everywhere

Archive for the ‘Violence’ Category

But She Didn’t Use Their Blood As Paint This Time!

They Both Swear They’re Straight

The Clerks There Have Turned It into an Annual Sporting Event

Oooh — And Graphic Intolerance!

I’d Totally Do That If It’d Make Me Young Again

But It’s Just a Cornish Game Hen

That’s What Everyone Says. And Everyone Lies.

Grandma Brought Me the Wrong Bag Lunch

I Stowed It in the Crawl-Space with Your Dignity

Which Is the First Rule Of Lesbian Fight Club