20-something woman #1: I have mixed feelings about this bar and grill.
20-something man: I hate this bar and grill.
20-something woman #2: I’m gonna burn down this bar and grill!
Las Vegas, Nevada
Archive for the ‘Violence’ Category
Grand Theft Auto: Apocalypse May Have Gone Too Far
Teenage ghetto boy: That’d be great, man, if everyone died … They’d be gone, and we could take all their cars!
Bus
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: Claire
In This Case, She Meant to Stun, Not Kill
Taxi cab driver: She ain’t big, but she ain’t little, you know. (pause) Broke that bottle over Anna head, but she mean well.
Sierra Vista, Arizona
Overheard by: K
Or I Would If I Didn’t Enjoy It So Much.
Reporter, at man’s house after he hit someone at a kids’ soccer game: Sir, how do you feel about your behavior?
Man, coming up to the door holding bowl of macaroni and cheese: I am ashamed. I slap my own face.
Milwaukee, Wisconsin
It’s an Identity
Boy to girl: Rape is not a choice.
San Diego, California
Pop Quiz: Which Of These Things Are True About Sarah Palin?
Hobo: You ever wanted to punch an asshole in the face? Now’s your chance, one dollar! I deserve it! I club baby seals, I vote Republican, I masturbate way too much! Quit laughin’ and start punchin!
Church & Duboce
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: C
But He’s a Fantastic Gymnastics Coach.
Girl #1: He stabbed me in the face, but he awright.
Girl #2: (unintelligible)
Girl #1: Yeah! It’s like he don’t care about my well-being.
Grand Rapids, Michigan
Then I’d Have to Sit Down and Rest
Fat drunk guy: Dude, I would totally kick a couple of chicks in the cunt!
Barley’s
Knoxville, Tennessee
The Chicken Doesn’t Count, Sir
60-year-old journalism professor: Oh, the choking game? Heh… I play that all the time.
Emerson College
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Sarah
A Gentleman Doesn’t Make You Bleed ’til the Third Date
Stoned girl at party: I don’t think I’m gonna call him back, he was fingering me in pretty rapey way.
Leamington Spa
England
Overheard by: Bleep
