Archive for the ‘Washington’ Category

Trans­la­tion: I’m About to Start Cry­ing

Jock #1: Dude, that bitch broke my heart.
Jock #2, eat­ing a bur­ri­to: I know, man. You were al­ways so un­hap­py, and I want­ed to, like, slap you around and make you hap­py.
Jock #1, singing soft­ly and star­ing blankly at the ground: I’m all out of love, I’m so lost with­out you…
Jock #2: Look, man, we boys, aight? But when you start singing cheesy-ass love songs to a chick that cheat­ed on you, gave you an STD, and shit on top of your car be­cause she’s cra­zier than a fuck­ing mon­key on crack with a ba­nana up its ass, some­thing’s wrong with you, and maybe we should­n’t hang out any­more.

Uni­ver­si­ty of Wash­ing­ton
Seat­tle, Wash­ing­ton

Over­heard by: Sam

You Might As Well Face It, You’re Ad­dict­ed to Lumps

Very preg­nant woman sur­round­ed by mis­be­hav­ing chil­dren: Preg­nan­cy is just such a gift. I mean, I feel so blessed. Like, this is what my body was made for, you know? I just feel so much more com­plete when I’m preg­nant. Know­ing that I’m grow­ing this life…
Young woman be­hind her in line, in­ter­rupt­ing: Madam? You are a walk­ing ad­ver­tise­ment for manda­to­ry birth con­trol.

Star­bucks
Seat­tle, Wash­ing­ton

Over­heard by: The guy ap­plaud­ing her