Archive for the ‘Wishes’ Category

Is This Any More Stu­pid Than the Po­lit­i­cal In­ter­pre­ta­tion? Dis­cuss.

Teenage girl #1, ex­plain­ing Shake­speare to friend: So, ba­si­cal­ly, Romeo is, like, a man whore. As soon as he knows some chick won’t have sex with him he gets all pis­sy and emo and goes af­ter some­one else.
Teenage girl #2: So, like, he just wants to make ba­bies? Man, I al­ways thought it was more ro­man­tic!
Teenage girl #1: Nope. He just wants to hop in­to bed with who­ev­er’s avail­able.

Birm­ing­ham, Al­aba­ma

…So Now Joe and I Are Dat­ing.

Nine-year-old: Lo­gan al­most got a girl­friend!
Six-year-old: Re­al­ly?
Nine-year-old: Yep. Re­mem­ber Court­ney?
Six-year-old: With the glass­es?
Nine-year-old: Yeah. He asked her out on the bus, but she said no. Af­ter that, Joe was like, “I want a girl­friend,” and I was like, “yeah, I know. Me, too, bud­dy. Me, too.”

Swim­ming Pool
Louisiana

Africans: Wow, They’re Fat Mon­sters and Stu­pid

Brunette: I wish I could speak those sweet African lan­guages.
Blonde: What sweet African lan­guages?
Brunette: Ya know, the ones where they cluck at each oth­er. Cluck cluck click­i­ty clack cluck.
Blonde: Yeah! I know what you mean. Clack clack cluck cluck click cluck clacky clack. (laughs)
Brunette, laugh­ing: I bet they just make stuff up!
Blonde: Yeah, dude! Clack clack click­i­ty clacky clack clack cluck! AKA, wan­na go get some cow…meat?
Brunette, laugh­ing: You’re re­tard­ed. I don’t think any­one in Africa says shit like that.

Michi­gan

More of A Guide­line, Re­al­ly

Guy: She’s Irish, so I re­al­ly hope at some point she says: “Shut yer piehole!“
Girl: I could pay her ten bucks to say it, un­less that vi­o­lat­ed the pie hole code.
Guy: First rule of pie hole: There is no pie hole code.

http://overheardlines.blogspot.com/2008/06/american-guy-apparently-on-his-way-to.html

Over­heard by: tim