Small child, pointing to an “eat pussy” graffiti painted on the side of a restaurant: Daddy, what does that say?
Father: It’s a menu.
Toronto
Canadia
Overheard by: Chikara
Archive for the ‘Words’ Category
Yeah, I’ve Had to Tell Tommy Hilfiger’s People No
Hobo #1, holding gallon of water: I’ve been trying to drink a lot of water. You need to clear that toxic shit out. You collect lots of, uh, what they called? Endorsements. Your body just builds up these endorsements, and they poison you! I think that’s what they’re called… You know what I mean?
Hobo #2: [Nods knowingly.]
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Rich
No Ice Cream for Anybody
Mom: We can’t have ice cream. You just had candy at the movie.
Little girl: Mom, you are such a gutter-skank.
Mom, flabbergasted: What did you say?! What did you call me?! Where did you hear that term?!
Little girl: Dad.
Capitol Street
Sacramento, California
Overheard by: Total Gutterskank
And Really, Really Stupid, Too
Frat boy #1: She was so dumb.
Frat boy #2: You should watch how you use that word. It doesn’t really mean stupid — it really means ‘deaf.‘
Frat boy #1: Okay, she was really deaf.
Colorado State University
Fort Collins, Colorado
Overheard by: English Major
It’s Not My Thing
Upset 20-something girl: I don’t like things where things are things inside of things!
Drexel University
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Zywiec
Cue the Commodores
Girl to friend: I can’t believe I fell asleep next to your vagina. I woke up and my face was next to your brick wall. [Kisses friend.] I love your brick wall.
Caribou Coffee
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: Bardley
That’s the Last Heterosexual Bender I’ll Be Going on for a While
Girl: Shit! I’ve been out of commission for, like, one week and there’s already three new gay words!
Casa dos Artistas Fashion Show
São Paulo
Brazil
The Next Stupid State Referendum
Loudspeaker in airport: Please don’t leave your belongings unattended.
Crazy lady, to no one: Did they just say homosexuality isn’t allowed in the airport?
Airport
Oakland, California
Overheard by: Kristina
…Is the Moral Of Every Law and Order Episode
Chick: We just have to accept that people are crazy-ass bitches.
Friend: Apparently.
Aurora, Colorado
Overheard by: Leevee
Your College Tuition Was Money Well Spent
Father: We went to the titty bar all the time when we were in Canada.
20-ish daughter: I wish you wouldn’t use the word ‘titty.‘
Father: Why not? Titty, titty, titty. Titty, titty, titty.
20-ish daughter: Cock, cunt, pussy, balls, dick.
Father: Point proven.
Connecticut
Overheard by: JPatrick
