Lit­tle Oedi­pus Nev­er Got Used to It

Moth­er quick­ly pulling young child along: You’ll just have to get used to hav­ing a hot mom, okay?

Great Amer­i­can Ball­park
Cincin­nati, Ohio

Over­heard by: Joey-Poey

And He Ac­cepts Loose Change Via Pay­Pal

Chick: That guy’s not a re­al bum — he has a lap­top!

Brown Line
Chica­go, Illi­nois

Over­heard by: Whit­ney Wro­bel

Sean Pre­ston Fi­nal­ly Snaps

Young boy to moth­er: Mo-ooom! Enough with the mad­ness!

Zank­ou Chick­en
Bur­bank, Cal­i­for­nia

And All Those Pills for Break­fast

Guy: I need some food.
Girl: You just had a cig­a­rette!

Pur­due Uni­ver­si­ty
West Lafayette, In­di­ana

It Does In­volve Balls

Dude: Is putting my hand on my balls a sport? Could be.

Sub­way
Toron­to, On­tario
Cana­dia

Over­heard by: Shani­qua

I’m Not Crazy

Col­lege guy: So, are you still a maybe-les­bian?
Col­lege girl, shrug­ging: I like pe­nis much bet­ter. Chicks are crazy, but if one licks me, I’m not gonna com­plain if they’re hot.

Uni­ver­si­ty of Ken­tucky
Lex­ing­ton, Ken­tucky

Is It on YouTube?

Dude: So, this Oh-di-pus guy killed his dad and mar­ried his mom.
Girl: Gross… So, did they do it?
Dude: Oh, yeah.
Girl: Cool.

Uni­ver­si­ty of Saskatchewan
Saska­toon, Saskatchewan
Cana­dia

Over­heard by: head­shak­ing­prof

More Or­ga­nized Than “We,” Gram­mar Slob

Lit­tle boy: Mom­my, why do they have Hal­loween can­dy out al­ready?
Moth­er: That’s for peo­ple who are more or­ga­nized than us.

Rochester, Min­neso­ta

Dad: You Know, Hon­ey, He’s Got a Point

Four-year-old to mom: Mom, you should get a new hus­band — one that will do more stuff with us. And Dad­dy can get a new wife — a skin­ny wife.

Or­lan­do, Flori­da

I’ll Es­ti­mate the Rise in the Dog and Cat Pop­u­la­tion to Be Sev­en Mil­lion and One, Bob

Guy, about Bob Bark­er: The show just won’t be the same with­out him. And the pet pop­u­la­tion is go­ing to ex­plode!

http://www.overheardinminneapolis.com/2007/06/only_if_we_forget_his_immortal.html

Over­heard by: the truth hurts