20-something guy in bar: If I could go back in time, would I stop Hitler? No. I would go back to Mardi Gras!
Auburn University
Auburn, Alabama
Archive for June, 2012
Reader Poll: How Many Things Are Wrong with This Relationship?
Girl to boyfriend: The only way you could ever top my dad in awesomeness is if I found out that he was actually Hitler.
Augusta, Georgia
Overheard by: Annissa
She Also Thinks “Wikipedia” Involves Sex with Minors
Girl: His ‘twitter’? You mean his dick?
UC Santa Cruz
…If Dora the Explorer Is on Vacation?
Woman on cell: Who’s going to protect Obama from the mafia?!?
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: Hadri
The Old Man and No Sea Was a Disappointing Seller for Hemingway
Conductor: We are now approaching Oceanside. Look out your window and you will see a beautiful view of the seaside.
Old man: I don’t see no sea! I don’t see no side, neither!
San Diego, California
Can I Knit That on a Little Pillow?
Friend to woman: So, could you be pregnant?
Woman’s partner, snidely: Nope, I’m pretty sure you have to have sex to get pregnant.
Woman: Well, yeah, I’m not a man, or especially kinky, so I draw the line at fucking assholes.
Christchurch
New Zealand
Or I’ll Be Late for My Inconsistent Parents Anonymous Meeting
Mother to ten-year-old son: Hurry up and finish your food. Chew slowly.
http://talovich.blogspot.com/2009_02_01_archive.html#2819583051848100657
Overheard by: Yugan Dali
