Mother: Why do people like you?
Teen daughter: What?!
Mother: I mean, why do people like to talk to you and be your friend? I just don’t get it.
Fairfax, California
Archive for August, 2015
Then We Have a Newfound Admiration for P.S.- I Love You
Mother holding DVD box to two tween kids: No, we can’t get this one, it has too much (whispers) anal sex.
Best Buy
Calgary
Canadia
Clinging to the Side Of the Bus With Magnets Was Pretty Clever, Though
Teen girl: My other friend is, like, sooo dumb, I’m so glad she isn’t dead!
66 Bus
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: kerminator
His Screenname Is BiggStudd4U
Late-20s blonde yuppie: I love him, and I think he loves me.
Late-20s brunette yuppie: That’s cool.
Late-20s blonde yuppie: Yeah, I think his name’s Paul or John or something.
North Beach
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: i love love
A Question My Dissertation on The Flintstones Seeks to Get to the Bottom Of
Female grad student on cell: Yeah, but what would be the societal benefit of having a bunch of dinosaurs running around?
SUNY Stony Brook
New York
…And Clear High Heels
College girl #1: I washed this shirt and it got, like, bigger!
College girl #2: Well, at least you can wear it with tights now.
College girl #1: I know, but I don’t want to look like a slut.
College girl #2: I feel like I look less slutty when I wear my sunglasses.
Boulder, Colorado
So Many Questions, So Little Time.
Boy #1: I shot my friend in the foot once.
Boy #2: What! How?
Boy #1: Well, we were really high in the woods, and my friend was wearing bunny slippers. He stuck his foot out of a bush and I thought it was a real rabbit… so I shot it!
Boy #2: What the fuck?!
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: McKenzie
Is It Wrong That We’re Most Disturbed by the Misuse Of “Ironic”?
Drunk girl to stranger: You’re dressed as Juno for Halloween? Oh my god, that’s so ironic! I’m pregnant for real!
East Lansing, Michigan
…Does Hallmark Make a Card Saying That?
Girl to friend: Sorry about your vagina, but I’m sure the dog is okay.
Bar
Colorado
…I’m Saving That for Marriage.
Girlfriend: Ugh, I can’t think about hot dogs or sausages when I eat them. I can’t bare to think what body parts I’m eating.
Boyfriend: Oh, hush. Look at what else you eat.
Girlfriend: I know, but I like you! And I wouldn’t eat your arm!
Jersey City, New Jersey
