Young woman on cell: I kiss my grandpa on the mouth, have I made out with him?
Palo Alto, California
Archive for April, 2017
Nature: 2 Nurture: 0
Teen Boy Scout (after narrowly avoiding tripping): And that’s why I’m so good at swing dancing. I have hips like an angel.
Amtrack
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: Duckie
Which Most People Only Try a Couple of Times in College
Girl #1: Yeah, I hate when people talk about babies like they grow in your stomach. They’re in your uterus!
Girl #2: Yeah, it’s so dumb. Like, that’s not even possible unless you swallowed a penis…or ate a baby.
Connecticut
The Sort Of Thing That Keeps Us in Business
Guy, telling girl how to inspect screws in a table: Reach up, right up in there…
Girl: Right here?
Guy: Yeah, can you feel it?
Girl: Uh-huh…
Guy: Okay, now can you play around with it with your finger?
Girl: Uh-huh…
Guy, after long pause: You know, if anyone overheard this conversation, it would sound pretty bad.
Security Park
Baltimore, Maryland
Overheard by: Cool Breeze
Wide Chicks Should Be Another Big Hit for the Wayans Brothers
Dude: And then we had to carry Elizabeth *three blocks* back to my place because she was too wide to fit in the car.
University of Arizona
Tucson, Arizona
Thanks, Gossip Girl!
Woman to friends: Who would have know that shaving my pubes wouldn’t get rid of pubic lice?
Chipotle
Towson, Maryland
Not Today, Though– I’ve Got Leg Cramps
Hobo: Hey baby, you ever had the back a yo’ knee fucked?
Girl in line at the show: Once…it was okay, I guess.
Hobo: Shitdamn girl, you’re a freak!
Ybor
Tampa, Florida
Overheard by: Gotta try that
Aren’t You Glad We Can All Joke About Mass Murder Like This?
Sweet-ass security guard: Miss, you’re going to have to hang up your phone and run it through the machine.
20-something girl intern: But I’m not a terrorist, and I’m on an important call. Can’t I just walk through?
Sweet-ass security guard: Miss, that would be like Timothy McVeigh driving up and asking “hey, can I park my car here?”
http://eavesdropdc.blogspot.com/2008/08/insert-inappropriate-terrorism-joke.html
Overheard by: Ian
Not Much of a ‘Break’ at All, Really
Girl: So, what did you do over the break?
Guy: Well, I beat off a lot.
Saugeen snack bar
http://overheardatwestern.blogspot.com/2007/03/wanna-share-this-cookie.html
Overheard by: eric
Seemed Pretty Serious at the Time
History student: Seriously? Hitler was in the Second World War?
Ovens Road
Perth
Western Australia
Overheard by: Have You Just Not Been Listening Or What?
