Spastic girl: Why does everyone keep biting my left shoulder?!
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: Deb
Archive for April, 2018
But Otherwise Quite Civilized
Dude: Is it okay if I bring her to the party this evening? She’s a Republican.
Bookstore
Florence, Oregon
…As Seen in Elmo’ Money, Elmo’ Problems.
Streetcar announcement: Next stop, Alton Avenue!
Crazy guy on streetcar: Next stop, house of contaminated puppies!
Streetcar announcement: Next stop, Greenwood Avenue!
Crazy guy on streetcar: Next stop, have you ever tried to kill a Muppet in an alley?
Toronto
Canadia
Overheard by: Felicity Thistle
But He Gave Me an A on the Midterm, So I Looked the Other Way
Chick: … And he was so dorky that he, like, mistook my ass for my vagina and he started fingering it, and I was like, ‘Oh, he’s a pro,’ but then I realized and was like, ‘… Oh…’
http://overheardatyale.blogspot.com/
Overheard by: overheardatyale
We Heart Zippy Unironically
Teen prep: Shell is a lot more expensive than GetGo these days. (later) I’m missing a lifetime movie right now!
Father: She’s like Zippy the Pinhead!
Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Shoppy
From the Sex and the City Cutting-Room Floor
Guy: So they said to her: “Carrie, you can’t wear a head lamp! That’s a really obvious sign!” And she said: “Yeah! Of adventure!”
Mukilteo Ferry, Washington
Overheard by: Just Me
Yay! Let’s All Join the Army!
Girl #1, loudly in quiet library: And we thought we were going to the lecture on reasons to join the army, but we accidentally went to the wrong lecture theater, and it was a medical lecture on burns patients!
Studying girl: Shhhhh!
Girl #1, loudly: And this med guy who knew we weren’t med students goes “This is a good lecture to come to! Lots of gory pictures!” and we were both thinking “Shit! Are these army people going to show us photos of people who have been blown up or something!?“
Studying boy and girl: Shhhhhhhh!
Girl #2: Can’t be as bad as that lecture from first year. Remember the photo of the person’s head who’d been run over by a train?
Girl #1, even more loudly: Yeah! And they showed us photos of a penis which had been bitten off!
(everyone in library, including studying boy and girl, burst out laughing)
Griffith University Library
Australia
Like “It’s My Potty (And I’ll Be Dry If I Want To)”
Teacher: Do you have to go potty?
Two-year-old girl: I don’t go potty anymore; I listen to music.
http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/420122010/i‑listen-to-music-to-make-potty-time-easier.html
Overheard by: wayzata
The Current Exit Strategy for Iraq
Dude: I was trying to moon them with your butt without you knowing.
Lebanon, Indiana
Apparently She Needs the Practice
Goth teen girl: If you don’t come back to me, I’ll kill myself.
Exasperated teen guy: Why the fuck do you do this shit to me?
Friend: Don’t listen to her. She’s always killing herself.
East Bay Diner
Oceanside, New York
Overheard by: Big Larry
