Archive for August, 2018

Or the Poor Baby Jesus

Amused girl: Okay, so the dog sits on the hay but it doesn’t want to eat the hay. Meanwhile, it pees on the hay and leaves its doggy smell on the hay… Now, the horse comes along and wants to eat the hay, but the hay smells of doggy piss so the horse can’t eat it… You, my dear, are the horse. Haha!
Annoyed girl: At least I’m not the piss.

Florida

Ah Well, You Can Always Become President.

Professor: Isaac Newton, on his deathbed, was proud to announce that he was a virgin. So if any of you want to be famous scientists, you are going to have to be willing to make a few sacrifices.
Girl, raising hand: Um.
Professor: Oh, is it too late?

De Anza Community College
Cupertino, California

Overheard by: shyinvisiblegirl loves physics

The Legacy of Enron

Belligerent hobo: Hey, you! Get back here! Open up that bathroom door! Get back here, or I’ll pull out my 401(k) on you!

418 East 34th Street
Indianapolis, Indiana