Guy #1: Let’s see Grindhouse.
Guy #2: What’s that about?
Guy #1: Jesus.
http://overheardina2.blogspot.com/2007/04/because-kurt-russell-is-lord.html
Archive for August, 2018
The Difference between Boys and Girls
Guy to girlfriend: My dick is aching for your vagina.
Girl: I missed you too.
Barista cafe
Mumbai
India
Overheard by: mehr
Or the Poor Baby Jesus
Amused girl: Okay, so the dog sits on the hay but it doesn’t want to eat the hay. Meanwhile, it pees on the hay and leaves its doggy smell on the hay… Now, the horse comes along and wants to eat the hay, but the hay smells of doggy piss so the horse can’t eat it… You, my dear, are the horse. Haha!
Annoyed girl: At least I’m not the piss.
Florida
Otherwise the Terrorists Win
Teenage girl #1 (suddenly): I wonder if there are strip clubs with just fat women.
Teenage girl #2: God, I hope so.
San Jose, California
Ah Well, You Can Always Become President.
Professor: Isaac Newton, on his deathbed, was proud to announce that he was a virgin. So if any of you want to be famous scientists, you are going to have to be willing to make a few sacrifices.
Girl, raising hand: Um.
Professor: Oh, is it too late?
De Anza Community College
Cupertino, California
Overheard by: shyinvisiblegirl loves physics
And With Oysters There’s No Guarantee Of Pearls
Loud 20-something girl: Ew! Oysters taste like cum!
Quiet, conservative-looking 20-something girl: No, they don’t! (immediately gets embarrassed and receives high fives from others at the table)
The Chimes
Baton Rouge, Louisiana
The Legacy of Enron
Belligerent hobo: Hey, you! Get back here! Open up that bathroom door! Get back here, or I’ll pull out my 401(k) on you!
418 East 34th Street
Indianapolis, Indiana
Can It Spank You and Bite Your Nipples? I Think Not.
Nursing instructor, about simulation dummy: Can in blink? Yes. Can it vomit? Yes. Can it urinate? Yes. Can it tell you what hurts? Yes.
Nursing student: Can it take you on a date?
Penn Valley Community College
Kansas City, Missouri
Overheard by: Nurse Badass
Sweetie, We’re Not Rich Enough for You to Be Eccentric
Little girl to mom: Umbrellas are some of my dearest friends!
Chinese restaurant
St. Louis, Missouri
I Bestride the Earth Like a Colossus
Biology professor: I’m on Viagra. That’s why I look different.
Christopher Newport University
Newport News, Virginia
