Archive for February, 2019

One Word: Hot.

High-school girl: Seriously, it looked like he’d used her neck as a teething ring or something.

Wilmington, Delaware


Invented by Mister Newton.

Professor: So, I can see that some of you try to care about my feelings, and others don’t give a fig.
Student #1: Whoa! Could you not use such harsh vegetables?
(entire class goes silent)
Student #2: I didn’t know a “fig” was a vegetable.
Student #3: I thought it was a grape. A dried grape.

Johnson & Wales University
Providence, Rhode Island