Nine-year-old to his little sister: I have to get my grandma her milk. I have to go all the way out to the West Side, and I’m low on gas. You need to hurry your ass up!
University and East 9th
Des Moines, Iowa
Archive for September, 2019
Can We Blame Robert Pattinson for This Conversation?
Teen girl #1: Ugh, there are so many mosquitoes here.
Teen girl #2: Quick! Get in the sun! They can’t bite you if you’re in the sun!
Teen girl #1, after pause: Are you thinking of vampires?
Burlington, Vermont
Overheard by: Isotope Feeney
Happens After Every NAMBLA Convention
Mom to eight-year-old son: Do you want pizza tonight?
Son: No! I can’t eat that, I just got pregnant!
Naperville, Illinois
Let Me Guess: You’re a Writer?
Loud 50-something woman, happy and upbeat: I’m just sad. And lonely!
Lafayette, Louisiana
And Now He’s All Wanting to Give Me Backrubs and Watch Hope Floats
Upper year girl, about much younger student: I couldn’t get him into bed any other way. I had to date him!
http://www.overheardatmcgill.com/archives/2008/10/17/desperate-times/
Overheard by: Paul
…After Faking Your Orgasm
Guy with cigarette: I have to go home to my girlfriend.
Friend: Just fuck her for ten minutes and then meet me in the bar.
Munich
Germany
Overheard by: How romantic…
I Have to Get Away from It As Quickly As Possible
Fast-walking emo kid: There is no slowing down when it comes to me and High School Musical.
Wal-Mart
Roanoke, Virginia
Overheard by: snarky writer
Things Are Very Different in California
Sobbing child: It’s not fair! That’s mine!
Little bully: So what? Don’t cry about it. You’re being so dumb.
Sobbing child: I’m upset! It’s okay for me to cry sometimes!
Preschool
Santa Barbara, California
Lucy and Ethel Have a Serious Falling-out
Well dressed woman on cell: No, no, no. That’s the problem, I can’t just shoot her because she is on my property. She has to be like breaking into the house or something… We’ll have to find another way.
Maket East Train Station
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
I’ve Got Theft Insurance on You
Mom, yelling to small boy as he wanders towards street performer: Fine, if that’s what you want, get stolen!
Ottawa
Canadia
