Why Americans Are Fat: Encapsulated

Wasted guy #1: Let me see your phone.
Wasted guy #2: Why?
Wasted guy #1: I need to call my cell.
Wasted guy #2: Why?
Wasted guy #1: To see if it’s in my pocket.

Dallas, Texas

Overheard by: Tswerve

Posted on December 28, 2023
Cell phones, Drunks, Texas

The Ones I Do Have Thankfully Have Easy-to-Remember 1-900 Numbers

Salesman to guy purchasing new phone: Yeah, we can totally transfer all your contacts and calendar and stuff to this new phone.
Guy (in English accent): Well, can you do that on this other model?
Salesman: No, you can't transfer your contacts from your old one to this model.
Guy (in English accent): Oh, that doesn't matter. I don't have any friends.

Austin, Texas

Posted on April 9, 2022
Cell phones, Default, Employees, Foreigners, Guys, Offers and requests, Questions, Texas, Weirdness

In the Hamptons, That’s a Marriage Proposal

Guy from inside Port-A-Potty: Oh, shit, I just dropped my BlackBerry in there!
Friend: Oh, man, what are you gonna do?!
Guy: Well, somebody’s got to stick their hand in there!
Dude waiting in line: I think I’ll use the other one. I don’t want to be the first person to piss on your BlackBerry.

Rock the Farm Benefit
East Hampton, New York

Posted on July 21, 2020
Cell phones, Friends, Guys, New York, Pee, Poop

One Day You Will Make Some Dork Very, Very Happy

20-something chick to friend on cell: I like how you're listening to the message I left you while I'm standing right here.
Friend: I just want to make sure I get the message, I don't want to be like one of those people who calls you back without listening to the message.
20-something chick: I hate those people! It's like, what if the message was really important? Like, “Help me, I'm dying! Don't call me back–it sets off the bomb!”

University of Mary Washington
Fredericksburg, Virginia

Overheard by: Good point

Posted on December 4, 2019
Cell phones, Colleges & Universities, Default, Feelings, Friends, Girls, On the phone, Threats, Virginia

Does It Make My Breasts Look Phoney?

Teen girl: Hey! This lip gloss matches my nipples! And my phone.

Galleria Mall
Las Vegas, Nevada

Overheard by: Jo

Posted on July 19, 2018
Body parts, Cell phones, Compare and contrast, Default, Girls, Malls, Nevada, Nipples, Teens

“Don’t You Feel It in Your Pants?” Would Become a New Hit Single for Usher

Loud teen girl on cell: Jaime, I’ve been calling you! Didn’t you feel it in your pants?

http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/299422489/maybe-not.html

Overheard by: yikes

Posted on June 15, 2018
Cell phones, Clothes, Default, Girls, Gripes, On the phone, Overheard in Minneapolis, Teens

We Can Think Of Better.

Girl #1 to friends: Anybody can be a cell phone.
Girl #2: That's a good t-shirt.

Hampton, Virginia

Overheard by: S. H.

Posted on October 18, 2016
Cell phones, Clothes, Clothing, Friends, Girls, Virginia

Now You Can Watch Videos While It Drops Your Calls

Chick: So, what’s so special about this phone other than making millions of people shit their pants simultaneously?
Guy: It hasn’t got any buttons, or some-such. It can tell who you want to call by reading your mind. Also, it smells like flowers and tastes like bacon. Which is handy, since it can regrow its own skin. And fly.
Chick: Well, I’ll be.

Scottsdale, Arizona

Overheard by: I did NOT shit my pants.