Man: I’m giving up bread for lent.
Woman: Is that because Jesus Christ died for your sins, or because you’re concerned with your figure?
Starbucks
San Diego, California
Overheard by: Maggie
Archive for the ‘Comebacks’ Category
What With the Muffin Top, Camel Toe, and Side Ponytail
Guy to girl: You just give off that vibe that says “make fun of me!”
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: marisawin
Is Anybody Shocked That Las Vegas Has Creepy Guys?
Creepy lurky guy at bar (walking up and smelling girl sitting at table): Sorry y’all. Just smells really good.
Friend of girl (giving guy a dirty look): That was awkward.
Creepy lurky guy: Well, maybe you shouldn’t be here then.
Friend of girl: Well, maybe you shouldn’t be trying to smell us.
Blue Martini
Las Vegas, Nevada
Overheard by: Ariola
Then He Was Like, “This Is a Job Interview, Tanya.”
Black teen girl to friend: He was like “you’re so high you don’t even know what to do!” and I was like “nigga, this ain’t the first time I smoked!”
Columbus, Ohio
Overheard by: Hancock
Plus I Feel a Little Gay Riding a Log
Intimidating black man on log flume: This ain’t no romantic cruise!
Busch Gardens, Florida
That’s the Beauty Of Singapore– You Don’t Have To.
Guy: Obviously, you’ve never been to Singapore.
Girl: Obviously, you’ve never pleased a woman.
Capitol Hill
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: bethany
Your Friends Say It All the Time.
Little girl, singing: You got a fat butt, you got a fat butt!
Mother: Now sweetie, that’s not nice to say about mommy.
Little boy: But its true!
Dressing Room
Union, New Jersey
Overheard by: Sarah
Also Why Ashley from Real Housewives Of New Jersey Has So Many Friends.
Prissy girl on phone: You have a stupid face. You have to be my friend.
Cardiff
Wales
Overheard by: Gordinho
Who Knew a Menorah Could Even Be Used That Way?
Casual guy: It’s amazing how chummy they are now.
Guy in suit: Chummy? They’re like having weird gay-slash-Jewish sex.
Thornton School of Music, USC
Los Angeles, California
Overheard by: Yapplebee
Competition for Upper Class Twit Of the Year Heats Up
Skinny ginger guy: Oh, don’t over-egg the omelet!
Gorgeous girl: Uh… Omelets are mainly made of egg…?
Skinny ginger guy: Just because you wear glasses and go to university you think you’re so smart. Well you’re not. Because you’re a girl! Nerrrrrrrrr!
Nottingham
England
Overheard by: Concerned_citizen
