Dude to older lady: What do you mean, you don’t know what a hooker is? [To security guard] Hey, tell my mother what a hooker is.
Kroger
Columbus, Ohio
Archive for the ‘Creepsters’ Category
Is Anybody Shocked That Las Vegas Has Creepy Guys?
Creepy lurky guy at bar (walking up and smelling girl sitting at table): Sorry y’all. Just smells really good.
Friend of girl (giving guy a dirty look): That was awkward.
Creepy lurky guy: Well, maybe you shouldn’t be here then.
Friend of girl: Well, maybe you shouldn’t be trying to smell us.
Blue Martini
Las Vegas, Nevada
Overheard by: Ariola
Your Honor, I Was Only Following His Instructions
Small Mexican man in hot dog suit: Eat me, eat me, eat me, eat me, eat me.
20-ish chick waiting to cross street: No, thank you.
Hot dog man: Eat me, eat me, eat me, eat me!
20-ish chick: No, really — thank you, but I’ll pass. [Muttering] God, will this light ever change?!
Hot dog man: Eat me, eat me, eat me!
Wrigley Field
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: Cubs Fan
Dude, That’s David Spade
Man at airport: I’m gonna go hug that kid. Maybe then his mom will start keeping an eye on him.
http://overheardlines.blogspot.com/
Overheard by: tim
Like His Penis, Once.
Creepy, vacant-eyed hipster, apropos of nothing: Jesus loves you. He made you. He shows me things.
http://overheardinpdx.blogspot.com/2008/04/messenger.htmlcom
Overheard by: Jen
Unless You Like Zima
Dude to two chicks: So, my friends are really nice… Just don’t accept any drinks from them.
http://overheardatwestern.blogspot.com/2007/03/for-they-will-only-buy-you-labatt-50.html
Overheard by: nate
That’s a Great Idea!
Goth girl: So by working to benefit communism, they started to think that communism wasn’t actually so bad!
Creepy guy: You know, some people say that young people aren’t deep. You’ve proved them wrong. (leaves)
Fat friend: Good thing he didn’t hear us talking about how Sims should be able to sell drugs.
Highlands Ranch, Colorado
Tonight, on Bizarre Rationalization Theatre…
Creepy guy with shriveled arm: Nah, I haven’t used in a couple months. But if I wanted to start again, I got a savings account now.
5 Bus
San Diego, California
Overheard by: mhd
Dude, I Think That Might Be a Sex Crime
Fat guy: So, I was getting head when all of a sudden I got this case of explosive diarrhea! I shitted everywhere, dude!
University of Hartford
West Hartford, Connecticut
Overheard by: Joa
Was It a Big Bang?
Guy, crying: Ahhh! I just had sex with Stephen Hawking right up here, in my head!
Starbucks
Biloxi, Mississippi
