One of three bros, ordering a cake: And could you make it say, “Sorry we stole your car”?
http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/473032303/a‑bottle-of-grey-goose-will-work-so-much-better.html
Overheard by: cake fixes all problems.
Archive for the ‘Crimes’ Category
All You Need Is a Duffel Bag
Woman to coworker: You’d think if they were going to decapitate someone they wouldn’t hide the evidence in their rear window.
West Lebanon, New Hampshire
There’s a Lot of Smoke around Me, but No Fire
Thug filling out employment application: Hey, when you say, ‘Have you ever been convicted of a felony?’ do you mean found guilty, or just sort of accused and arrested?
Wendy’s
Indianapolis, Indiana
Overheard by: maybe he shouldn’t use the plastic silverware…
Grand Theft Auto: Apocalypse May Have Gone Too Far
Teenage ghetto boy: That’d be great, man, if everyone died … They’d be gone, and we could take all their cars!
Bus
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: Claire
Real World Cast Members Have No Goddamn Respect
Crazy lady: Oh, no! Those teenagers did not just steal my outhouse!
Denver, Colorado
Overheard by: Aristide
And It’s Not So Much “Pick Up” As “Break Out”
Little girl pointing to City Hall: That’s where we pick up daddy!
Mom: No, it’s across the street at the jail.
http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/387165179/its-a-valuable-lesson.html
Overheard by: not good
It’s an Identity
Boy to girl: Rape is not a choice.
San Diego, California
Then Ask Him How Much He’ll Pay to Adopt You
Harried mom to adorable eight-year-old girl: You just ask a policeman. Next time you see a policeman you ask him, “Is it illegal for me to sleep in my mommy’s car?”
Toronto
Canadia
For the Last Time, Tasseled Loafers Do Not a Mafia Make
Chick: Gay is not an ethnicity! I don’t care if they have their own mafia!
Outside Central Library
Calgary, Alberta
Canadia
You Wanna Do That, the Army’s Recruiting Right Down the Block
Customer having lunch: Can I smoke at this table?
Waitress: Honey, you’re in Nevada. You can smoke, gamble, drink, screw and cuss. Just don’t kill nobody!
Bucket of Blood Saloon
Virgina City, Nevada
Overheard by: Philly Joe
