Overheard Everywhere 2020-05-18T04:30:11Z https://overheardeverywhere.com/feed/atom admin <![CDATA[‘Cause Then She Took One of My Legs and Snapped It]]> 2020-05-18T04:30:11Z 2020-05-18T04:30:11Z Skinny girl: My roommate’s nuts. We got into another fight. Tall girl: Oh, God, what is it now? She’s mad again ’cause you don’t rinse every drop of toothpaste out of the sink, right? Skinny girl: No, it’s the mayonnaise! The fucking mayonnaise! She accused me of eating it! Just the plain mayo, not on a sandwich or anything. I looked at her and told her, ‘Listen...

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admin <![CDATA[All You Need Is a Duffel Bag]]> 2020-05-17T15:56:33Z 2020-05-17T15:56:33Z Woman to coworker: You'd think if they were going to decapitate someone they wouldn't hide the evidence in their rear window. West Lebanon...

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admin <![CDATA[Did You Just Whinny?]]> 2020-05-17T03:51:37Z 2020-05-17T03:51:37Z Redhead: If I were a horse, I would totally do this one [points to horse in magazine]. Blonde: If you were a horse, you would do them all. Redhead: Yeah! There’s the Quarter Horse, the Mustang, the Appaloosa, and the Arabian. Ohhh, the Arabian! [Shivers.] Raleigh...

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admin <![CDATA[…With a Preference for Manila Sex]]> 2020-05-16T15:27:31Z 2020-05-16T15:27:31Z Out-of-towner: I like being paid in envelopes; it makes me feel like a prostitute. Philadelphia, Pennsylvania Overheard by:

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admin <![CDATA[He's Been Known to Pleasure Several Girls en Brochette]]> 2020-05-16T03:04:30Z 2020-05-16T03:04:30Z Girl #1: His penis was huge, like 12 inches! He was holding it and his hand looked so tiny! Girl #2: No wonder he doesn't get any play, that shit hurts! Girl #3: Yeah, it would like come out my ass! Philadelphia, Pennsylvania Overheard by:

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admin <![CDATA[And Now It’s Payback Time]]> 2020-05-15T14:19:07Z 2020-05-15T14:19:07Z Girl: Hey! That guy pierced my nipple on Friday! http://overheardatwestern.blogspot.com/2007/04/get-him.

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admin <![CDATA[What Did I Say When You Asked That About Carrots?]]> 2020-05-15T02:00:19Z 2020-05-15T02:00:19Z Girl on cell: Are avocados vegetarian?

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admin <![CDATA[Every Time I Try That, I Lose Some Memory]]> 2020-05-14T13:45:11Z 2020-05-14T13:45:11Z Mom: Arrrrgh. My brain just isn’t working today! Eight-year-old (deadpan): Did you try turning it off and on again? Steveston Canadia Overheard by: laughing sangria out my nose...

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admin <![CDATA[My Secret? I Like Forcible Sex]]> 2020-05-14T01:15:10Z 2020-05-14T01:15:10Z Drunk teen: Anyone could be a rapist… I could be a rapist, that lady with the bag could be a rapist… [Lady with bag looks over, appalled.] Oh, well, I’m sure you are really very nice! King’s Cross Night Bus London England Overheard by:

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admin <![CDATA[When Coal Mines Kidnap Unsuspecting Citizens]]> 2020-05-13T12:47:49Z 2020-05-13T12:47:49Z Blonde on cell: Can't get a signal here. I guess it's all the metal. Friend #1: Or that we're in an elevator. Friend #2: Underground. Newport...

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