Overheard Everywhere 2018-08-14T03:08:21Z https://overheardeverywhere.com/feed/atom/ WordPress https://overheardeverywhere.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/08/cropped-everywhere-favicon-32x32.png admin <![CDATA[We Stumble Around Drunk with Dignity]]> 2018-08-14T03:08:21Z 2018-08-14T03:08:21Z Girl to another: Woah, that was not me who peed all over that seat. I mean, did you see that girl stumble out? She couldn't even stand up! I mean… and we're the strippers?! Classy.

Camelot Strip Club
Washington, DC

admin <![CDATA[Think Reproduction]]> 2018-08-13T14:55:36Z 2018-08-13T14:55:36Z Cashier: Whoa, those are interesting checks!
Old woman: Yeah, they usually get a reaction.
Cashier: Are those dancing skeletons?

Pat’s IGA
Calumet, Michigan

admin <![CDATA[Granted, I Cut Her, but They Still Owe Me Ten Bucks]]> 2018-08-13T02:04:32Z 2018-08-13T02:04:32Z Gay guy: I told them not to have hip-hop night cause a bitch would get cut. And what happened? A bitch got cut!

Outside The Hippo
Mt. Vernon, Mayrland

admin <![CDATA[God, You're So Competitive, Jason!]]> 2018-08-12T13:29:33Z 2018-08-12T13:29:33Z Ditzy woman: It would look more like Australia if it was an island, because Australia is an island… right?
Ditzy woman's daughter: I think that's the smartest thing that's ever been said in my presence.
Ditzy woman: Well, somebody in this family has to be brilliant.
Four-year-old boy: Dogs are kinda like vampires because they both have pointy teeth.

Harrisburg, Illinois

admin <![CDATA[Not As Cute As a Baby with a Cigar, but Close.]]> 2018-08-12T00:41:21Z 2018-08-12T00:41:21Z Life insurance rep: So how many cigarettes do you smoke a day?
Young woman: Oh, maybe like three or four…
Life insurance rep: Oh, that's cute.

Jersey City, New Jersey

admin <![CDATA[He’s Got the Extemporaneous Rhyming, but Can He Rope-a-Dope?]]> 2018-08-11T12:16:33Z 2018-08-11T12:16:33Z Voluble man: Hey, blondie! Hey! Guess what? I’m the prettiest man on this here bus! I’m like Muhammad Ali! Get your degree, smoke your crack free, national American methiversity! Hey, blondie! Guess what? I gots the prettiest dick on this whole bus! You should come over and check it on up!


Overheard by: blondie

admin <![CDATA[I Don't Think You Have Much Choice]]> 2018-08-10T23:59:56Z 2018-08-10T23:59:56Z Woman on phone: So you want me to call her anyway and tell her that I'm not coming to a party that I wasn't invited to?

Park Ave
Long Beach, New York

Overheard by: Christina Federici

admin <![CDATA[We've Found That First-Born Children Are Too Much Of a Hassle.]]> 2018-08-10T11:18:16Z 2018-08-10T11:18:16Z Conductor over PA: Forge Park, last stop. Please look around you and take all of your belongings. If you leave anything behind… We like tens and twenties.

Commuter Rail
Franklin, Massachusetts

admin <![CDATA[We Just Post Your Photo in the Breakroom and Throw Tomatoes at It.]]> 2018-08-09T23:06:44Z 2018-08-09T23:06:44Z Fundraiser on phone: So what made it a cult? (pause) No, we don't record this information.

Reed College
Portland, Oregon

admin <![CDATA[Boys Are As Disposable As Kleenex]]> 2018-08-09T10:51:18Z 2018-08-09T10:51:18Z Girl #1: Hey girl, what's up? How's your summer? You still runnin' 'round with that bad boy?
Girl #2: Oh no, he dead.
Girl #1: He dead?! No! He dead? When?
Girl #2: Few weeks ago. It don't matter. We weren't goin' out no more.