Overheard Everywhere 2017-09-19T03:22:58Z https://overheardeverywhere.com/feed/atom/ WordPress https://overheardeverywhere.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/08/cropped-everywhere-favicon-32x32.png admin <![CDATA[Michigan Girls Make a Bid for the Title]]> 2017-09-19T03:22:58Z 2017-09-19T03:22:58Z Girl #1 in bathroom stall: My poop looks awesome! It has things in it! Come, look!
Girl #2 (waiting outside stall): No.
Girl #1: Come on!
Girl #2: No.
Girl #1: Please?
Girl #2: No! I never will.
Girl #1: I just won't flush it and then you'll have to look.
Girl #2: You better flush that shit!

Grand Rapids, Michigan

admin <![CDATA[Otherwise No One Will Believe Me]]> 2017-09-18T14:30:02Z 2017-09-18T14:30:02Z White basketball coach at end of middle school game: Wait… Wait! Don’t let any black people leave. I need to take their picture!


Overheard by: A rare sighting

admin <![CDATA[With Dresden As a Possible Exception]]> 2017-09-18T01:55:09Z 2017-09-18T01:55:09Z Professor: Well, they had Nazis, but those aren’t exactly lighting fixtures.

Theatre Class, SUNY
Geneseo, New York

Overheard by: Jeni

admin <![CDATA[Just a Silent High Five]]> 2017-09-17T13:28:34Z 2017-09-17T13:28:34Z Hot young suit #1: What happened with your girlfriend?
Hot young suit #2: I manipulated her into a false sense of security, then rooted her, then dumped her — same as I did with Mandy. [After a pause] I’m not looking for praise.


Overheard by: Rosebyanothername

admin <![CDATA[Or When Tyra Had the Realness of Her Breasts Verified]]> 2017-09-17T00:35:22Z 2017-09-17T00:35:22Z Girl #1: Tyra will never be as good as Oprah. The Tyra show just doesn’t have the credibility that the Oprah show has.
Girl #2: Well, Tyra does serious shows sometimes; like when Hilary Duff is on.

Auburn University
Auburn, Alabama

admin <![CDATA[Even Those Who Didn't Have Much in the Top Department]]> 2017-09-16T11:32:34Z 2017-09-16T11:32:34Z Girl on phone talking about going to a strip club for the first time: I mean, I really felt bad for those girls, they like, had to dance around topless!

Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Overheard by: What did she think strippers did?

admin <![CDATA[…And That He Watches According to Jim??]]> 2017-09-15T23:29:13Z 2017-09-15T23:29:13Z College sorostitute: Well, I thought we'd been dating for, like, 3 months. But then I looked at his Facebook profile, and it said “single.”
Non-slutty college friend: You had to use Facebook to…
College sorostitute: Also, did you know he had a kid?

Charleston, South Carolina

Overheard by: Nuddles

admin <![CDATA[Like an Open Spirit and Three Hits of Acid]]> 2017-09-15T10:58:22Z 2017-09-15T10:58:22Z Teacher: What you get from Beatlerama depends on what you bring to it.

Science class
Richmond, Virginia

Overheard by: mollydear

admin <![CDATA[I'd Ejaculate Prematurely Just to Get out of Her]]> 2017-09-14T22:53:24Z 2017-09-14T22:53:24Z Dude #1: I was gonna ask her to be my girlfriend.
Dude #2: Why didn't you?
Dude #1: I realized I fucking hate her.

Daly City, California

admin <![CDATA[Naturally, It’s Huge]]> 2017-09-14T10:24:43Z 2017-09-14T10:24:43Z Young mom, looking disgusted at a paparazzi photo of Pamela Anderson: That’s disgusting.
Four-year-old son: What?
Young mom: Honey, what’s wrong with this picture?
Four-year-old son: I can see her penis.

Bowling Alley

Overheard by: Aunt Oblivious