Old man: I recently had surgery. What was it I had removed? Something that starts with a ‘P’…
Old lady: Was it your pancreas?
Old man: No… It wasn’t my penis, either, because I definitely still have that.
L.L. Bean Outlet
Wareham, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Amanda
Guy #1: What is that?
Guy #2, holding sunscreen: Oh, it's sport sunscreen. My mom made bring it.
Guy #3: Dude. Why do you have so many ointments?
Guy #2: The back of my legs get burnt.
Guy #1: You moisturize?
Canada's Wonderland
Vaughan, Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: Shan
[Line for ladies’ room]Girl #1: Hi, do you mind if I cut in front of you? It’s urgent.
Girl #2: Sure.
Girl #1: Thanks, I have to change my tampon.
Girl #2: [Blank stare.]Girl #1: I have to make sure I change it often. Not too often, because once I changed it too much and got chlamydia.
Girl #2: Oh…[Suppresses laugh.]
Western Australia
Australia
Loud woman #1: My friend is on that. When you fart, it makes you shit oil.
Loud woman #2: Really?
Loud woman #1: Yup, you shit oil and grease.
http://overheardinphilly.blogspot.com/2007/08/exxonmobil-is-now-in-pharmaceuticals.html
Overheard by: grossed out
Important looking man on cell: So, apparently, Georgia is being occupied by Russia. What this means to us is… Oooh! Toothbrushes!
Washington, DC
Overheard by: ak
Girl #1: He stabbed me in the face, but he awright.
Girl #2: (unintelligible)
Girl #1: Yeah! It's like he don't care about my well-being.
Grand Rapids, Michigan
Drunk gay guy in pub garden, at top of voice: So I got hepatitis c when I was fisting this guy… There was blood everywhere.
Leamington Spa
England
Overheard by: Bleep
Women #1: Oh, I know why I feel crappy–cramps.
Woman #2: Ew! Me too. Very PMS-y. Craving Cheetos.
Woman #1: That's serious.
Rochelle Park, New Jersey
Girl #1: Who was that?
Girl #2, hanging up cell: My boyfriend.
Girl #1: What’d he want?
Girl #2: Tampons.
Tennessee
Overheard by: Jenni
