Overheard Everywhere

Archive for the ‘Holidays’ Category

Isn’t That because It’s Ann Landers’s Birthday?

Professor: Adams and Jefferson weren’t the only presidents to die on the Fourth of July. Does anyone know the third?
Student #1: Was it Monroe?
Professor: Yes, Monroe also died on the Fourth of July. Quite interesting, isn’t it?
Student #2: Is that why we celebrate the Fourth of July?

Liberal Ed floor, Columbia College
Chicago, Illinois

Overheard by: Ready to graduate

Allison Took Silver at the Entitlement Olympics

Flight attendant to woman putting luggage in the only overhead compartment left: Ma’am, if you put your luggage there, but go way up front, when the plane lands, you’ll have to wait to deplane until everyone else has because you can’t go back here if you’re up front when people are trying to exit the plane.
Woman: But this is my only option!
Flight attendant: You could sit in the back.
Woman: No!

Allegiant Airline
Ft. Wayne, Indiana

Overheard by: ISPgypsy

Anybody Have Any Bread?

(student coughs violently into hands, spewing fake blood)
Lit professor: Oh my god! Are you okay?
Student: (coughing up more blood) Can I go to the bathroom?
Lit professor: Oh my god, go, go!
(student leaves)
Lit professor: (realizing it’s April 1st) Haha… His consumption smells like raspberries.

Colorado University, Boulder

Overheard by: In the back of the classroom