Lesbian to girlfriend: … That was back when I was dating this pharmacist and my sister-in-law decided to start this rumor that both of us were into this thing… [makes subtle fisting motion].
Elevator, Penrose Hospital
Colorado Springs, Colorado
Archive for the ‘Lesbos’ Category
I’m Going Back to the Isle of Women
Lesbian: People eat testicles here, too?!
http://www.overheardinminneapolis.com/2007/06/what_do_you_mean_by_too.html
Overheard by: orly
How Most of Us Feel About Seventh Heaven
Boi lesbian talking to shorter boi lesbian: Those motherfuckers are sweet as shit. Those bitches make me sick.
Tacoma, Washington
Overheard by: Maybe she likes them to be mean?
When You Locate the Controls Of Your Spacecraft
Quirky lesbian professor leading class in Kegel exercises: And everybody squeeze, hold, hold…release and squeeze, two, three…release.
Ditzy Indian, after shiver spasm: It gives me the willies!
Quirky lesbian professor: It’s great, right!
Health Ed Class
Borough of Manhattan Community College, New York
Overheard by: Trying not to laugh at all the serious faces trying to hide these private exercises
…Just by Slipping That Home Depot Catalog under Our Mattress
Soccer mom: I can’t believe I was able to convince my husband that I was gay.
Museum of Fine Arts
Boston, Massachusetts
You Try Getting Vaginal Juice and Chocolate Sauce Out of Shag
Lesbian: You might think I’m weird, but what if we put in rubber floors?
Girlfriend: Um, no. [Lesbian #1 stalks off toward drywall materials, muttering under her breath.]
Home Depot
Plymouth Meeting, Pennsylvania
This Is Still Lindsay Lohan’s Most Functional Relationship to Date
Drunk lesbian to sober girlfriend: Aw, I wanna puke but I can’t!
Sober girlfriend: I would punch you in the stomach if you wanted …that’s how much I love you.
Drunk lesbian: Awww, that’s sweet.
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: Claire
And Tucked in Your Gunt
Lesbian bartender: I am so mad right now.
Gay bartender (affectionately touching her cheek): Awwww…honey… You shaved!
Boston, Massachusetts
After Our Morning Squirtacular
Lesbo to another: I know! And all I knew is that all I could smell was my best friend’s vagina.
Gay pride festival, Volunteer Park
Seattle, Washington
How to Gain Great Face in a Sushi Restaurant
Waiter: Does anyone have a green Firebird?
20-something lesbian: I do, why?
Waiter: It’s on fire in the parking lot!
(20-something lesbian and girlfriend go outside and return ten minutes later)
Waitress: Is everything okay?
20-something lesbian, matter of factly: Yeah, my car just caught fire. Can we have another plate?
Girlfriend, unaffected: Also, she ordered tempura.
Sushi Garden
Tucson, Arizona
