Archive for the ‘Overheard at York’ Category

Shiny, Though

Girl #1: That Zodiac movie looks pretty good…
Girl #2: Of course! It has Jake Gyllenhaal in it. Everything he touches turns to gold.
Girl #1: Oh, I know!
Girl #2: Mmm, I’d like him to touch me.
Girl #1: But it would be so uncomfortable to be all gold down there.
Girl #2: [Silence.]Girl #1: What?
Girl #2: God, you’re stupid

When the Veil Lifts, Revealing the Male Mystery

Girl: So, I was here yesterday and there was this, like, gorgeous guy standing in front of me. And then guess what he did? He let one go! Seriously! It wasn’t quiet, either — more like someone ripping carpet off a floor. I wondered if he’d messed himself… Gnarls Barkley again? Don’t they have any other mixed tapes?

Stupid Internet

Girl at humanities tutorial: Did we have to have works cited for our essay?
TA: Yes, you need to cite your sources.
Girl: That’s so unfair! I can’t be penalized just because I didn’t have works cited!
TA: You need to cite your sources.
Girl: But what if I didn’t have any sources?

Overheard by: headdesk

If Only There Were Some Way to Limit How Many Can Register

Professor #1: Trying to crowd thirty-two students into a space meant for sixteen just isn’t working.
Professor #2: Oh, really?
Professor #1: Is it at all possible to have the room reassigned without wading through the bureaucracy?
Professor #2: No, and that’s why I always assign the thickest and most difficult readings in the first two weeks.

Overheard by: Ian