Overheard in Philly

Nine-year-old boy: Mom, my stomach hurts.
Mom: Then take off your pants.

http://overheardinphilly.blogspot.com/2007/05/mom-im-nine-and-even-i-know-that-sounds.html

Overheard by: academia

Frat guy: You ever been to the Franklin Mills Mall?
Bimbette: No! I live in King of Prussia! If I left King of Prussia to go to any other mall, it’d be like leaving Italy to eat at an Olive Garden. No!

http://overheardinphilly.blogspot.com/

Overheard by: impressed, she has a point

Little kid: Mommy, why are there so many Asians here?

http://overheardinphilly.blogspot.com/2007/05/quiet-they-might-make-you-read-math.html

Overheard by: renee

Very gay man: I need to sit like a man…wait, how do I do that?

http://overheardinphilly.blogspot.com/2007/06/you-didnt-get-manual-during-initiation.html

Overheard by: almost a lawyer.

Male student: My GPA doesn’t mean shit if I can’t wipe my own ass, you know?

http://overheardinphilly.blogspot.com/2007/05/when-youre-right-youre-right.html

White construction worker: What was the name of Speedy Gonzales’ cousin? The slow one…
Mexican construction worker: Why?
White construction worker: Because I want to start calling you that…

Hamilton Street
http://overheardinphilly.blogspot.com/2007/03/too-stupid-to-be-racist.html

Overheard by: slowpoke rodriguez

Bathroom-bound tech woman: Are you following me? Not that many people follow me at my age.
Tech guy: No. I’m more of the ‘call-is-coming-from-inside-the-house’ kind of guy.

http://overheardinphilly.blogspot.com/

Overheard by: 2catchapredator

Bubblehead: Well, it’s inhumane. I don’t think they should keep them in cages… The, you know, what-do-they-call-em… kinky Jews.
Frat boy: Dumbass, they’re kinkajous. It’s a small, monkey-like animal, not a person.
Bubblehead: Oh. That’s different, then.

http://overheardinphilly.blogspot.com/2007/03/let-them-control-world-or-theyll-throw.html

Overheard by: crankyprof

Old lady in return line at Wal-Mart: Where are the adult-sized EZ-Bake ovens?

http://overheardinphilly.blogspot.com/2007/07/you-know-ones-with-90-watt-lightbulbs.html

Overheard by: big momma

Guy with hair down to waist and death metal t-shirt: I really enjoy eating animals that have the ability to eat humans.

http://overheardinphilly.blogspot.com/2007/05/feeling-is-mutual-im-sure.html

Overheard by: horrified zoo-enthusiast