Enraged Frenchman to woman and son who is discreetly peeing on wall: What is wrong with you? Find a bathroom, this is a business! (starts walking away and then comes to a woman and her teenage daughter sitting on steps) And you two, get out! What are you, from the mountains? (to himself, walking away) Oh my god! I don’t believe this!
Fira
Santorini
Greece
Costumed dad to little girl: You need to listen. Understand? You will not take your clothes off!
Star Wars 30th Anniversary Celebration
Los Angeles, California
Seven-year-old boy, stepping off train, to parents: We’re in the middle of nowhere!
Train Platform
Maplewood, New Jersey
Overheard by: KBN
Father, dragging boy for being naughty: I have had enough of this! You’re a horrible child!
Son: But I won’t do it again, I promise! (cries hysterically)
Father: Yes, you said that 13 times ago, but you still do it! You’re a horrible boy, so we’re going to disown you.
Son: Nooooo!
Father: Shut up.
Telford
England
Overheard by: nicmunn
Child runs out into busy parking lot.
Mom: Careful! There are old people driving!
Overheard by: Eric Smith
Little girl looking at display of puffed wheat snacks: What’s the difference between puffed and fried?
Mom: Puffed is better for you, so you can eat more of them.
Little girl: But I don’t like puffed.
Dad: Puffed is gay.
Crossroads Market
Calgary, Alberta
Canadia
Overheard by: Laura
Mother to toddler son in stall: Honey, I really don’t understand your obsession with tights.
Arclight bathroom
Los Angeles, California
Overheard by: flashback to my boyfriend’s childhood
Overtired mom, after seeing infant fail to grasp something: See? Their reflexes suck. That’s why babies don’t drive cars.
Stunned husband: Uh, that and they can’t see over the steering wheel.
Wellsboro, Pennsylvania
Mother: It’s so hot out! My ice cream is splooging.
Father: Yeah, my ice cream just splooged all over my hand.
Teen daughter: Hahahaha.
Mother: Why are you laugh– Oh.
Syracuse, New York
Overheard by: melissa
Three-year-old to parents: Jesus is mean.
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Hat Tip 🎩 to The Marketing Scientist
