Girl to friend: I’m not an alcoholic.
Friend: I’m not an alcoholic, either.
Girl: Cheers to us not being alcoholics!
Austin, Texas
Archive for the ‘Pride’ Category
…in Exchange for Cooking Lessons
Conductor: This train will terminate at Stratford. The next station is Waterloo. Please change here for the Bakerloo, Northern and Waterloo & City lines. Alternatively you can also change for Waterloo International, catch the next Eurostar, go to Paris and show the French how to play rugby.
London
England
Overheard by: kat
Yeah? Depends.
Hubby to wifey: No power on earth will make me wear a diaper.
http://nimbleit.21publish.com/OverheardUtah/archive/2005/11/27/1e8zyoejva474.htm
Overheard by: Jessie
Only in the Holodeck, Though.
Proud girl: Ever since I gave up drinking, I have been drinking so much wine.
Chicago, Illinois
So What Else Ya Got?
Spoiled nine-year-old: People only love me for my stuff.
Day Care
Wichita, Kansas
Overheard by: amused
Those Poopyheads Have Already Exhausted Their Five Minutes of Fame
College girl: There, I’ve belittled and insulted The View without using the word “bitch” or the c‑word.
Student Center, Montclair State University
New Jersey
Overheard by: …and that itself is a feat
Using a Venus Razor Does Not Make You a Goddess, Ms. Pratt
English teacher: It’s a big responsibility to be a goddess, it troubles me all the time.
A.C. Flora High School
Columbia, South Carolina
…Bowser
Little boy to grandma: Once, when I was camping, I sat on my biscuits, then I put my biscuits on a rock and ate them like a dog.
Grandma: Oh, uh… That’s nice…
Australia
You Might As Well Face It, You’re Addicted to Lumps
Very pregnant woman surrounded by misbehaving children: Pregnancy is just such a gift. I mean, I feel so blessed. Like, this is what my body was made for, you know? I just feel so much more complete when I’m pregnant. Knowing that I’m growing this life…
Young woman behind her in line, interrupting: Madam? You are a walking advertisement for mandatory birth control.
Starbucks
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: The guy applauding her
…With a Hatred Of Great Strengthiness
Girl: You know, I’m usually a very wise person. Recently, with my situation, I lost a lot of my wiseness, but this trip has brought back that wiseness.
Boy: So, your wiseness never informed you it was called “wisdom”?
Girl: I hate you.
Banora Point High School
Australia
