Chick: Well, my mom wouldn’t let me on the train until I wore pants, so there ya go.
Southmoor station
Aurora, Colorado
Chick: Well, my mom wouldn’t let me on the train until I wore pants, so there ya go.
Southmoor station
Aurora, Colorado
Five-year-old boy, loudly interrupting adults: I have a wedgie!
(adults laugh)
Five-year-old boy: This wedgie train is carrying wedgies!
Green Line
Boston, Massachusetts
Flight attendant: Contrary to popular belief, pushing the button with the flight attendant on it will not turn your flight attendant on. So don’t push it.
Flight to New York
Overheard by: Erica Lynn
Loudspeaker in airport: Please don’t leave your belongings unattended.
Crazy lady, to no one: Did they just say homosexuality isn’t allowed in the airport?
Airport
Oakland, California
Overheard by: Kristina
Conductor: Next and final stop: Atlantic City, folks!
(several passengers give confused and bewildered looks)
Conductor: Yeah, I changed my mind. I don’t like Trenton.
Trenton, New Jersey
Overheard by: passenger
Tourist lady, as train approaches the end of the line: So how are they going to turn this train around?
Daughter: They don’t have to. It can go in either direction.
Tourist lady: Well, are they at least going to turn the seats around?
Subway
Washington, DC
PA: Paging arriving passenger Juan Sanchez from Mexico City. Please return to gate B4 to retrieve your piñata.
Airport
Charlotte, North Carolina
Man on cell on train: No, I told you nothing’s wrong, I’m just tired. (very long pause) No, nothing’s wrong. We don’t need to have a talk. (long pause) No, I told you, nothing’s wrong. I’m on the train. (very long pause, then annoyed) Do you want to make that pasta tonight? That sounds like fun.
Chicago, Illinois
Pilot over PA, after taxiing to the gate for ten minutes: Let me know if you guys see something that looks like an airport.
Denver International Airport
Denver, Colorado
Overheard by: they’re not kidding about being the country’s biggest airport
Automated train station announcement: Castro street station.
Excited little girl: Yay! Castro!
Bystander: The dictator or the district?
Excited little girl thinks for a second: The rainbows!
Castro Street Station
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Dawn
Hat Tip 🎩 to The Marketing Scientist