Little boy: How ’bout you get naked, and I get naked, and then we give naked hugs!
St. Joseph, Michigan
Archive for the ‘Sex’ Category
Or Gave Me Religious Pamphlets. I Forget.
20-something girl: Do you remember that guy last night?
Friend: Oh, him? Yeah, I think he motor-boated me.
Canisius College
Buffalo, New York
And I Haven’t Been Mowed in Quite Some Time
Gay son: I need a sugar daddy.
Mother: You and me both.
Gay son: But I have a booty.
Mother, after long pause, and looking out the window: I have weeds where I once had grass…
Murrieta, California
Overheard by: I hope I don’t become my mother
The Feel of Flesh, the Endurance of Metal
Tech enthusiast: Wait, did you say ‘cyber sex’?
Dude: No — cyborg sex.
Tech enthusiast: Cyborg sex? That’s even better!
http://weirdosofwinnipeg.blogspot.com/2007/03/resistance-is-futile.html
Is That How You Resolve Things with Your Dad?
Guy #1: Man, I’ve tried everything. I don’t know what to do.
Guy #2: Have you tried sex?
Guy #1: Actually, no…
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Why Is There One In Your Office?
Thesis advisor to uncomfortable-looking advisees: You girls might be too young for it, but if you ever have the chance to have sex on a water bed, you should do it.
Colgate University
Madison County, New York
On the Plus Side, It Totally Livens Up the Post Office Line
Girl: It’s like, you’re just doing whatever, and suddenly you’re in the middle of an orgy, you know?
Friend: Yeah, I totally know.
Memorial University, St. John’s
Newfoundland, Canadia
Overheard by: Clearly doing
I Poop in Little Rock, Arkansas.
Tough guy at urinal: So you live around here?
Tough guy at different urinal: Nope, just pee here.
Grand Rapids, Michigan
Overheard by: Cameron
Getting a Piece Of Tail Is Always a Problem in Ohio
Woman to man: She fucked the lobster?
Cincinnati, Ohio
…While Pretending You’re Alan Rickman
Guy, clueless: Wow, I can’t believe Snape was evil the whole time!
Girl, exasperated: I can’t believe I fuck you every night.
Cinema, after Harry Potter
New York City, New York
Overheard by: Ellen
