Overheard Everywhere

Archive for the ‘STDs’ Category

The Centers for Disease Control Have a Whole Josh Wing

Hoochie: Yeah, I don’t know, but Josh and I totally hooked up for a while last year.
Friend: What? Why?!
Hoochie: What do you mean, ‘Why’? Josh is hot.
Friend: Dude, hooking up with Josh is like hanging a sign on your vagina that says, ‘Come on in, chlamydia.’ If I was looking for a communicable disease, Josh is the first place I’d go.
Hoochie: Oh…

California State University-Chico
Chico, California

Overheard by: Kimberly

We Thought Only Americans Knew This Little About Sex Ed.

[Line for ladies’ room]Girl #1: Hi, do you mind if I cut in front of you? It’s urgent.
Girl #2: Sure.
Girl #1: Thanks, I have to change my tampon.
Girl #2: [Blank stare.]Girl #1: I have to make sure I change it often. Not too often, because once I changed it too much and got chlamydia.
Girl #2: Oh…[Suppresses laugh.] 

Western Australia
Australia

It’ll Pop Up Again in the Spring

Guy #1: Are you gonna get tested?
Guy #2: I think the Lauren thing pretty much takes care of it.
Guy #3: You should still get tested.
Guy #2: Yeeeah, but I don’t like getting blood taken from me and I don’t have any like, symptoms, so…
Guy #3: Well, I haven’t seen your penis.

Simon Fraser University
British Columbia
Canadia

Her “Extra Help Sessions” Are Well-Attended

LSAT instructor: So, these female sage grouse do a visual inspection to make sure the males don’t have an infection before mating. If I had the same attention to detail, maybe I wouldn’t have gotten chlamydia three times.

Ft. Worth, Texas

Overheard by: Not So Hot For Teacher