Wife: This is the last chance. I’m really going to file for divorce unless you’re willing to work at this.
Husband: I deserve someone that I won’t cheat on.
Omaha, Nebraska
Archive for the ‘Threats’ Category
I’ve Never Felt So Alive!
Male professor, in a very girly voice: Aaaahhh! I’m being trampled by sea horses.
UMass
Amherst, Massachusetts
Top 10 All Time Scorer on Grand Theft Auto
Guy at ID counter: I’m sorry. Don’t shoot the messenger.
Old lady: I’d rather shoot the police…
http://overheardinumcp.blogspot.com/2006/10/uhhh.html
Overheard by: tom
We Thought Only Americans Knew This Little About Sex Ed.
[Line for ladies’ room]Girl #1: Hi, do you mind if I cut in front of you? It’s urgent.
Girl #2: Sure.
Girl #1: Thanks, I have to change my tampon.
Girl #2: [Blank stare.]Girl #1: I have to make sure I change it often. Not too often, because once I changed it too much and got chlamydia.
Girl #2: Oh…[Suppresses laugh.]
Western Australia
Australia
The Legacy of Enron
Belligerent hobo: Hey, you! Get back here! Open up that bathroom door! Get back here, or I’ll pull out my 401(k) on you!
418 East 34th Street
Indianapolis, Indiana
The 1990’s Called…
Philosophy professor, proving his argument: Therefore, if I don’t get a little crazy, then I’m never gonna survive.
Michigan State University
Michigan
Overheard by: sjshock
Put the Bedazzler Down, Bert
Guy, aggressively: I’ll sparkle you!
The Eiffel Tower
Paris
France
Overheard by: Emily
Sure, Alberto. Sure.
Yelling man: Don’t try to pick my pocket! I’m in the FBI! I have a badge! I know the Constitution! I could kill you!
http://overheardinpdx.blogspot.com/2007/07/law-and-order.html
Overheard by: b!X
I Don’t Care If You Are My Grandma.
Man on cell: What? You calling me fat pussy? I will punch you in the face!
Boston, Massachusetts
What Really Happened at Hiroshima
Hungry person: I would sacrifice a million Asians for 10-dollar sushi.
http://www.overheardatmcgill.com/archives/2007/03/01/thats-actually-the-going-exchange-rate/
