Married man at party: They went after my nipples!
Washington
Overheard by: Salazar
Archive for the ‘Washington’ Category
Hey, Some Shoes Aren’t Virtuous– Crocs? Wingtips?
Young gay man: Whereas, lacking the virtue of shoes, men must content themselves with being jerks.
Female friend: A poor consolation, and unfashionable.
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: Bethany
Grand Theft Auto: Apocalypse May Have Gone Too Far
Teenage ghetto boy: That’d be great, man, if everyone died … They’d be gone, and we could take all their cars!
Bus
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: Claire
I’m Beginning to Regret Taking You to Therapy.
Little girl trying on boots: Mom, can I get them?
Mom: Yes, but you have to take them off.
Little girl: Will you help me?
Mom: No, if you don’t know how to take your own shoes off by now, I’ve done something very wrong.
Little girl, in low voice, taking boots off: …you have.
Target
Bellingham, Washington
Overheard by: Rachel
That’s the Beauty Of Singapore– You Don’t Have To.
Guy: Obviously, you’ve never been to Singapore.
Girl: Obviously, you’ve never pleased a woman.
Capitol Hill
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: bethany
I Don’t Like Feeling Exotic
Little girl to mother: I always get weirded out when we come to Asian markets.
Mom: Why is that?
Little girl: Because there are so many Asian people in one place!
Mom: Why is that weird?
Uwajimaya
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: Koley
Honey, Not the Strawberry — I’m Still Sore From Last Night
Chick: … But it’s only about the size of a strawberry.
Dude: And all I’m saying is that a strategically placed strawberry can exert a surprising amount of pressure.
Random passerby: Right on!
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: snickerpants
I’m Suing for Breach Of the Social Contract
Smelly drunk in silent library room: You don’t work for me? Man, no one knows that they work for me!
Public Library
Seattle, Washington
Firefighters Multitask Brilliantly
Drugstore cashier to another: Are the firemen here to shop? Or is someone down again?
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: jamjam
And I’m a B‑Cup, Easy
Teenage boy to teenage girl: I have a bigger penis than you.
Seattle, Washington
