Squirtle’s a No-Brainer, but Jigglypuff’s Going to Be Tough

High school boy #1: Know what I’m gonna do?
High school boy #2: You’re gonna jizz in my mouth.
High school boy #1: I’m gonna go to a third world country, buy four people, put them in an arena, and make them play Super Smash Brothers in real life. For Pikachu I’m gonna put thousand-volt batteries in his cheeks.

Ride-On bus
Washington, DC

Overheard by: bus rider