Rhode Island

Dad in locker room, to son: Jake, take your pants off.
Five-year-old son, singing: Take your pants off, do the ducky-ducky.
Dad: Jake!
Five-year-old son: Take your pants off, do the something-something.

Newport Athletic Club
Middletown, Rhode Island

Theology professor: I can talk about whores and sex with animals… It’s in the Bible!

Providence College
Providence, Rhode Island

Overheard by: too busy laughing to take notes

College girl: I’m taking this online Arabic course… Did you know their alphabet is just all, like, smiley faces?

Providence, Rhode Island