Professor: Will someone please close the door? I don't want anyone else to hear the stupid things I say. Oh, wait, I have tenure now–I don't care if they hear me saying stupid things!
Georgia State University
Professor: Will someone please close the door? I don't want anyone else to hear the stupid things I say. Oh, wait, I have tenure now–I don't care if they hear me saying stupid things!
Georgia State University
Professor to suits: Did you watch the news last night? Apparently Dumbledore's gay now!
UC Davis
Davis, California
Overheard by: Passing Biker
Art history professor: Those long ship voyages… you're looking at the sheep, the sheep's looking back at you, and “hey!”
Allegheny College
Meadville, Pennsylvania
Professor: Then the electrons are passed around like a hot potato or, you know, a cheerleader.
Radford University, Virginia
(math test is interrupted by a loud construction drill in the next room).
Student: Oh my god, I can't take this test anymore! Can you tell them to stop, please?!
Teacher: Heh… At least there aren't bullets flying over your head.
Concord High School
California
Overheard by: When I was in Vietnam
Professor: We think imperfectly. If you think you think perfectly… well, just talk to god.
University of Tulsa, Oklahoma
Professor: I make no sense to myself, I’m surprised I know my own name. Why? Because life sucks. But I have a nice jacket!
Christopher Newport University
Newport News, Virginia
Spacey English major: So… he’s a queer writer, right?
Surprised teaching assistant: No. He’s just Jewish American.
Spacey English major: Oh, same thing.
University of Tennessee
Knoxville, Tennessee
Overheard by: Jessica
Professor, during a discussion about Lear’s daughters in King Lear: well, don’t you guys ever lie?
(class stays silent)
Professor: You all lie, especially the girls.
Carleton University
Ottawa
Canadia
Teacher: I’m leaving for a few minutes. Ted*, you’re in charge.
Ted*: Alright, everyone get naked.
High School Classroom
Englewood, Colorado
