Health teacher: The four types of sexual activity we’re going to cover are vaginal intercourse, anal sex, oral sex, and mutual masturbation.
Eighth grader: Oral sex? Isn’t that, like, over the phone?
Pyle Middle School
Bethesda, Maryland
Overheard by: Next year the teacher preempted the question in her lecture
Student #1 seeing friend drinking Monster energy drink: Oh, I’ve never had a Monster. Can I have a taste?
Student #2: You don’t want to taste his AIDS-infested Monster!
Student #1, after long pause: Never. Say that. Again. Ever.
Doughnut shop
Huntington Beach, California
Shopkeeper: How’s your wife? Did they take her in to have the baby yet?
Shopper: Yeah, they took her in this morning to be seduced.
Bangor
Northern Ireland
Overheard by: limeinside
Little girl, repeatedly: Bow-chicka-wow-wow!
Barnes & Noble
Melbourne, Florida
Mom reading book: This says ‘odd.’ Do you know what ‘odd’ means? It means something is funny or weird. Like when you said you wanted to eat a rock — that was odd.
Red Line train
Washington, DC
Overheard by: Sitting behind them trying not to laugh
20-ish girl: Wait… Is it the Specific Ocean or the Pacific Ocean?
Sarasota, Florida
Father looking at sign: Look! You could work here when you start school.
Son: Why would I want to work here? They can’t even spell ‘prerequisite’ right.
Father: That’s because it’s per-quisite.
Ohio
Overheard by: glad to be sharing a school with this kid
Kid #1: Man, you always say that word when you’re drunk.
Kid #2: Yeah, I know. I need to stop watching that Michael Richards video.
http://overheardatlc.blogspot.com
Dude: What are some words that rhyme with ‘chicken’?
Chick: Frickin’, lickin’, hair.
Dude: ‘Hair’ doesn’t rhyme with ‘chicken’!
Chick: Yeah, it does — chicken, hair; chicken, hair.
Dude: Yeah, I guess it kind of does.
Metro bus
Minneapolis, Minnesota
Macho dude in Student Government Association: I'll smite you with my boobs!
Cafeteria
Tunxis Community College, Connecticut
Overheard by: Girl in Black
