Girl: T9 is responsible for so many mishaps. Once I tried to text someone “thanks for helping me”. Instead I typed “thanks for humping me.” It was bad!
Tacoma, Washington
Girl: T9 is responsible for so many mishaps. Once I tried to text someone “thanks for helping me”. Instead I typed “thanks for humping me.” It was bad!
Tacoma, Washington
Girl: I’ll have the chocolate peanut butter car crunch.
Cashier teenage boy: Ummmm… Yeah, the “car” actually stands for “caramel”.
Gelato Spot
Scottsdale, Arizona
Overheard by: Fake Blonde
White, middle aged music professor: I don’t do sevenths. Homie don’t play that.
Hartford, Connecticut
Overheard by: Claire
Irritated English professor: I think I’m just going to change all my paper assignments to “create an inscrutable utterance.”
Ursinus College
Pennsylvania
Guy: Egg salad is a dish best served cold.
http://overheardinumcp.blogspot.com
Overheard by: alyssa
Smart girl: Obviously ‘irregardless’ is the wrong word in the sentence.
Dumb girl: Why is that word wrong?
Smart girl: For starters, it’s not even a real word.
Dumb girl: Sure it is — I use it all the time.
Erie Community College
Orchard Park, New York
Overheard by: Smarty Pants
One of three bros, ordering a cake: And could you make it say, “Sorry we stole your car”?
http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/473032303/a‑bottle-of-grey-goose-will-work-so-much-better.html
Overheard by: cake fixes all problems.
Old man: I recently had surgery. What was it I had removed? Something that starts with a ‘P’…
Old lady: Was it your pancreas?
Old man: No… It wasn’t my penis, either, because I definitely still have that.
L.L. Bean Outlet
Wareham, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Amanda
Student #1: So what do you think, eh?
Student #2: Are you Canadian?
Student #1: Why in the world are you asking me that? Is it because I said “eh”?
Student #2: Well, yeah.
Student #1: That is a total misconception! Not all Canadians end sentences with the word “eh”! I can’t believe you think that!
Student #2: (thinking it over) So are you?
Student #1: Canadian? Yes.
Wabash
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: Laughing as I pass
Comic book artist: Is the word “stab” or “poink” best for a dog nose being inserted into someone’s butt?
Group of coworkers in unison, very serious: “Poink,” definitely.
Portland, Oregon
