Large, beefy boyfriend: Wow babe, what you said was really extinct… wait, doesn't “extinct” mean dead and not here anymore? I think I mean “distinct” or something.
Nerdy girlfriend: I love you.
Georgetown University
Washington, DC
Large, beefy boyfriend: Wow babe, what you said was really extinct… wait, doesn't “extinct” mean dead and not here anymore? I think I mean “distinct” or something.
Nerdy girlfriend: I love you.
Georgetown University
Washington, DC
Professor: Then the electrons are passed around like a hot potato or, you know, a cheerleader.
Radford University, Virginia
Slutty chick: STDs!
Sluttier chick: I don't need one.
Slutty chick: STDs!
Sluttier chick: I'm on my period, yo!
University of Connecticut
Overheard by: Unwilling Audience
Guy on phone: Does she move when you have sex with her? Maybe that's the problem.
University Park, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Bill
Professor: We think imperfectly. If you think you think perfectly… well, just talk to god.
University of Tulsa, Oklahoma
Professor: I make no sense to myself, I’m surprised I know my own name. Why? Because life sucks. But I have a nice jacket!
Christopher Newport University
Newport News, Virginia
Spacey English major: So… he’s a queer writer, right?
Surprised teaching assistant: No. He’s just Jewish American.
Spacey English major: Oh, same thing.
University of Tennessee
Knoxville, Tennessee
Overheard by: Jessica
Guy: Leggings are fucking up everything. I used to know when it was winter because girls would stop wearing skirts, but now thanks to leggings they can wear them all year. It’s bullshit.
Connecticut College
Dude: Just because you masturbate to llama/turtle porn…
Marist College
Poughkeepsie, New York
Overheard by: Russ
Guy #1: You’re beautiful… you’re beautiful.
Guy #2: No… but I’m not fuckable beautiful!
University of California, San Diego
Overheard by: whoa mango
