Girl: Every time I walk into Stop ‘N Shop and get a whiff of Irish Spring I think of your testicles.
Seton Hall University
South Orange, New Jersey
Overheard by: Never will think of Irish Spring the same way again
Girl: Every time I walk into Stop ‘N Shop and get a whiff of Irish Spring I think of your testicles.
Seton Hall University
South Orange, New Jersey
Overheard by: Never will think of Irish Spring the same way again
Teenage girl to friend: I want a boy. If I get a girl I'm going to shove her back in.
New Jersey
Girl #1: Dude, my phone is ringing but I don't want to pick it up…I'm too high right now.
Girl #2: Pick it up, it may be important.
Girl #1 (picking it up): Hello? (hangs up)
Girl #2: Well, who was it?
Girl #1: I don't know, just a bunch of voices.
New Brunswick, New Jersey
Overheard by: Zboots1
7-year old kid #1: It's raining.
7-year old kid #2: The hurricanes are upon us, bitch!
7-year old kid #1, after long pause: It's raining.
New Jersey
Overheard by: it was raining
Professor of Physiological Psychology: … And that’s why you go down to the crackhouse with a wad of cash.
Rutgers University
New Jersey
Mom, giving toddler a stocking: That’ll keep you quiet for a minute. [Toddler starts stretching it over his face.] Awww, that’s so cute. Are you gonna go rob a bank?
DSW Shoes
New Jersey
Overheard by: Unburdened shoe shopper
Older man to friend: I don't like being murdered! Do you know how it feels like to be murdered? Trust me, you don't want to know. I'm always being murdered.
Princeton, New Jersey
Overheard by: uhh am I seeing ghosts?
Dad, changing son's diaper: Why don't you want to wear a diaper? You want to run around naked and piss and poop all over the floor?
Son: Yeah!
Dad: What are you, an anarchist?
New Jersey
Teenage boy to teenage girl: I wish I could get in the car with lesbians… Wait, no, I don't.
Tinton Falls, New Jersey
Chick #1: I’m telling her the dumpling story.
Chick #2: Which story? Oh, the one about how people get off on being peed on?
Chick #1: What?!
Princeton, New Jersey
Overheard by: Ladle
