Woman: Why does it smell like something's burning? Maybe it's my flesh…(sniffs hand) Nope!
Benicia, California
Overheard by: Liz
Woman: Why does it smell like something's burning? Maybe it's my flesh…(sniffs hand) Nope!
Benicia, California
Overheard by: Liz
Drunk girl #1: That's the first men's bathroom I've ever been in that didn't have porn mags!
Drunk girl #2: Not ones that you could see!
Lincoln, Nebraska
Woman: How old is that bible?
Clerk (picking it up): 1911.
Woman: Thats the first one?
Clerk: First what?
Woman: First bible.
Clerk: (astonished silence)
Resale Shop
Hammond, Indiana
Slutty chick: STDs!
Sluttier chick: I don't need one.
Slutty chick: STDs!
Sluttier chick: I'm on my period, yo!
University of Connecticut
Overheard by: Unwilling Audience
Spacey English major: So… he’s a queer writer, right?
Surprised teaching assistant: No. He’s just Jewish American.
Spacey English major: Oh, same thing.
University of Tennessee
Knoxville, Tennessee
Overheard by: Jessica
Guy #1: What’s the big deal about the bird flu anyway? I’m not a bird.
Guy #2: It’s those people who play with bird crap and such. It’s kinda like the chicken pox, see what I mean?
Guy #1: Well, I’m fine then because I already had the chicken pox.
Reno, Nevada
Overheard by: Scott
Gucci girl to friends: God! I’m so tired of my Nazi book group! (silence) I mean, they don’t want cookies, they don’t want to socialize, it’s just like, book book book you may not mention anything besides the book!
Glencoe, Illinois
Overheard by: I was worried for a minute
Dumb girl: So what’s the difference between when the guy hits the ball and someone catches it and when someone hits the ball and no one catches it?
Boy: Absolutely nothing.
PETCO Park
San Diego, California
Guy walking opposite traffic on a one-way street: If I get hit by another car my mom will be pissed.
Clemson, South Carolina
