But It’s a Miracle Diet

Chick: I was just in the bathroom trying to throw up, and I just can’t do it! I just gag. A penis can make me throw up, but my own two fingers cant… I hate giving blowjobs.

Montclair State University
Montclair, New Jersey

Overheard by: BTON

Posted on October 6, 2023
Bimbettes, Colleges & Universities, Gripes, Hands, Health & Hygiene, New Jersey, Penis

Lie Back on Your Hands and Hold Still!

Girl on cell: He had stubby fingers. Little stubby butcher’s fingers. You wouldn’t want to feel those caressing your body… He was a good lay, though.

http://www.overheardatmcgill.com/archives/2007/06/26/his-filet-was-tres-mignon/

Posted on August 17, 2023
Hands, On the phone, Overheard at McGill

Which, As We Both Know, Is More Than We Can Say for Dad.

Little girl to mom: But I am getting real good! Yesterday I didn't get any poop on my hand!

Public Restroom
Iceland

Posted on July 26, 2023
Compliments, Europe, Hands, Kids, Moms, Parenting, Poop, Restroom

I Told Them They Were “Perky” the Other Day, and They Sobbed and Called Me Cruel

(two guys peeing next to each other at the urinals)
Pretty boy #1: I think I have sensitive wrists.
Pretty boy #2: You have sensitive nipples!

Bowling Alley Bathroom
Dayton, Ohio

Overheard by: Liz

Posted on June 8, 2022
Default, Friends, Gripes, Guys, Hands, Nipples, Ohio, Restroom

…Penis.

Professor: I can assume people don't walk on their hands, but some people might do it to fool me, because I have a robot.

George Mason University
Fairfax County, Virginia

Overheard by: NoRobot

Posted on April 2, 2022
Colleges & Universities, Compare and contrast, Default, Hands, Teachers, Technology, Virginia, Weirdness

It Really Doesn't Age Well

Guy to another: Don't shake my hand, dude, it's still got pussy on it!

Men's Bathroom
Bar, Alabama

Overheard by: So glad I don't live here anymore

Posted on September 20, 2021
Alabama, Guys, Hands, Restroom, Vagina

Now I Go to the Nursing Home and Do That to Grandma

Mom passing rows of whole fish: When I was a little girl, I used to poke their raw eyeballs with my finger!
Little boy: Wow!

Pike Market
Seattle, Washington

Overheard by: wow indeed

Posted on January 17, 2021
Animals, Body parts, Default, Hands, Kids, Memory lane, Moms, Tourist attractions, Washington, Weirdness

…Mister “I Cut Myself with Safety Scissors”

Son to father, exiting hospital: Dad, what's a disability?
Father: It's like when someone loses their finger in an accident, (pause) which will probably happen to you.

http://eavesdropdc.blogspot.com/2008/04/father-knows-best.html

Overheard by: Jon

Posted on January 10, 2021
Dads, Eavesdrop DC, Hands, Health & Hygiene, Kids, Parenting, Weirdness, Words

So It's Like…a Gay Bar?

Guy, after burning left hand: But this is my special hand…
Friend: Why can't you just use your right hand for a while?
Guy: It's like being jerked off by a stranger.
Friend: What?
Guy: Imagine a stranger comes up to you and starts talking to you, and suddenly just starts jerking you off. (pause) Yeah. That's how it feels like.

Bayonne, New Jersey

Posted on December 30, 2020
Compare and contrast, Guys, Hands, Masturbation, New Jersey

He's Been Known to Pleasure Several Girls en Brochette

Girl #1: His penis was huge, like 12 inches! He was holding it and his hand looked so tiny!
Girl #2: No wonder he doesn't get any play, that shit hurts!
Girl #3: Yeah, it would like come out my ass!

Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Overheard by: Just 2

Posted on May 16, 2020
Ass, Compare and contrast, Girls, Hands, Penis, Pennsylvania, Sex