Student: Okay, so maybe he was inside me and I was moving around, but it wasn’t sex.
Williamsburg, Virginia
Student: Okay, so maybe he was inside me and I was moving around, but it wasn’t sex.
Williamsburg, Virginia
Student: So, I went to the state library the other day.
Friend: What was it like?
Student: Well, I never made it into the actual book section.
City bus
Brisbane
Australia
Overheard by: Sara
Professor: Who can tell me the difference between a birch tree and a beech tree?
Student: A beech tree’s got lighter bark.
Professor: But otherwise there’s no difference?
Student: I dunno ’bout the leaves or anything, but when you buy furniture from IKEA, beech wood’s always lighter.
Professor: But could you identify a birch tree from a beech tree if you saw one on campus?
Student: If I cut it down, maybe.
http://overheardatstanford.blogspot.com/
Overheard by:
Teacher, reading paper by student #1: ‘I’m not living my life yet.’ Then whose life are you living?
Student #1, pointing to student #2: His.
Mount Abraham Union High School
Bristol, Vermont
High school student #1: Sir, what movie are we going to be watching?
Teacher: Well, until we get the VCR fixed, we’ll be watching dead air.
High school student #2: What year was that movie made, sir?
Bus
Windsor, Ontario
Canadia
Dude on cell: I was so excited we got new washers in the dorm laundry room… I know! You can wash, like, an entire homeless person in those!
University of North Texas
Denton, Texas
Overheard by: Big Rob
Religion professor: Why did Jesus die?
Student: Loss of blood?
College of Charleston
South Carolina
Student: Are breasts on the exam?
Professor: No, no, they’re not. Not because I don’t like breasts… I do… They’re just not on the exam.
Biology 102, Rutgers University
New Jersey
Overheard by: Marina
Chick, responding to example question: You can’t randomly choose which woman gets an abortion and which doesn’t!
Professor: Why not?
Chick: Because some women do want to give up their babies!
Professor: I don’t care! I’m a statistician!
Statistics class, Ohio State University
Columbus, Ohio
Overheard by: Rachel
Girl #1: The school paper couldn’t use that picture.
Girl #2: Why not?
Girl #1: They said there were too many people in it.
Girl #2: We were in China!
Rider University
Lawrenceville, New Jersey
