Gucci girl to friends: God! I’m so tired of my Nazi book group! (silence) I mean, they don’t want cookies, they don’t want to socialize, it’s just like, book book book you may not mention anything besides the book!
Glencoe, Illinois
Overheard by: I was worried for a minute
College girl #1: If I’m pregnant, the father is either him or his cousin.
College girl #2: Wait, you slept with David* and his cousin?
College girl #1: It wasn’t a big deal, it was a threesome!
Barnes & Noble
Cary, North Carolina
Overheard by: Jennifer
Bimbette: What’s wrong with gay people? Gay people are funny.
Religion Class
El Paso, Texas
Bimbette government teacher, explaining checks and balances: So then, like, the national government says to the state government, “Um, you can’t do that, you little… like, state.”
Canton, Michigan
Girl #1: I can understand the idea behind having an affair…
Girl #2: Yeah, it’s the change of scenery.
Girl #3: The change of dick…
East Lansing, Michigan
20-something in pink heels, on a Saturday afternoon: God, I’m like frickin walk of shame Barbie right now.
eavesdropdc.blogspot.com
Drunk bimbette: Oh my god! I used to like this ugly guy once… Then I realized he was ugly and stopped liking him.
Barbeque
Jundiaí
Brazil
Drunk girl in bar to bartender: You should be so lucky as to have sex with me.
Bartender: I wouldn’t fuck you for practice.
Richmond, Virginia
Overheard by: warm ups?
Girl walking to bus stop drunk: I just wanted to walk in, get groped and leave.
Pheasant Run
Harrisonburg, Virginia
Overheard by: Brandon Call
Girl #1: At least he didn’t say what JD said to me the other night. He said I was boring in the bedroom because I didn’t try new things.
Girl #2: Oh my god!
Girl #1: Yeah and I told him, well how am I supposed to know what to do? I was a virgin before you. Well, not literally a virgin, but close enough!
Girl #2: So what are you going to do?
Girl #1: Well, I told him that when we go on vacation, we can have a threesome. But it has to be someone I’ll never see again.
New Brunswick, New Jersey
Overheard by: Slutgers Girl
