Chick: Oklahoma and Ohio — I always get those two mixed up.
Dude: Yeah.
Chick: Wait, which one is in the middle of the country?
Dude: Uh, they both are, kind of.
Chick: Oh, well, which one is a state?
Dude: Both.
Chick: Yeah, that’s why I get them mixed up!
http://overheardatcornell.blogspot.com/2006/10/long-overdue-update-part-2.html
Overheard by: taranto
Bimbette #1: Let me turn on the flash — it’s dark in here.
Bimbette #2, after picture: Oh my god, that was so bright! That was like when the cop shined the flashlight in my eyes at my DUI.
Bimbette #3: Could he see your brain?
Movie theater
Ridgefield Park, New Jersey
Overheard by: Big J
Girl: I love this new toothpaste I got. It has green tea in it and tastes absolutely fantastic. It feels like there’s a tea party going on in my mouth, and I just want to invite my teddy bears or something!
Melbourne, Florida
Overheard by: Ali and Livi
20-ish girl: Wait… Is it the Specific Ocean or the Pacific Ocean?
Sarasota, Florida
Obsessive girl: Who do you think would win between a pig and a bat? I think a bat would win!
http://www.overheardatmcgill.com/archives/2007/03/27/not-unless-its-a-louisville-slugger/
Chick: I was just in the bathroom trying to throw up, and I just can’t do it! I just gag. A penis can make me throw up, but my own two fingers cant… I hate giving blowjobs.
Montclair State University
Montclair, New Jersey
Overheard by: BTON
Girl #1: Ewww, that tastes like glue! I mean, I imagine if I knew what glue tasted like, it would taste like that.
Girl #2: You know what tastes like glue? Rice noodles.
http://overheardatcornell.blogspot.com/
Overheard by: scott
Blonde tanning at pool: Someone set the alarm for five minutes — I’m gonna stare at the sun.
Columbia, Missouri
Clerk: Ninety-five percent of all guys are jerks; the other 10 percent are okay.
Dunkin’ Donuts
Newark, New Jersey
Overheard by: Chris
Girl #1: Is that hail?
Girl #2, looking out window: No, it’s just some guys stepping.
Girl #1: Oh. I was wondering why the hail had a beat.
Mississippi University for Women
Columbus, Mississippi
