Religion

Sunday school teacher (showing picture of Good Shepherd): Who can tell me who this is?
Kid: That's Jesus with the whacker!
Teacher (puzzled): You mean he takes the sheep out for a walk?
Kid (pointing to the shepherd's crook): No, when one of the sheep tries to get away from Jesus, he whacks them with it so they won't go!

http://overheardintheward.blogspot.com/

Explosive, neurotic 20-something to friend: Say your prayers, mantis pants!

Vancouver, BC
Canadia

Queer #1: I remember you! Are you Jewish?
Queer #2: No! I'm from Charleston!

Gay Strip Club
Atlanta, Georgia

Overheard by: Oh, thank god!