Girl #1, after hearing embarrassing story: Yeah, that reminds me of the time I got kicked out of the Vatican for being a whore.
Girl #2: Seriously? Kicked out?
Girl #1: It was my dad's fault, though. He told me I could wear my short skirt.
Thai Restaurant
Boone, North Carolina
Overheard by: Elizabeth
Woman #1: It's raining, didn't you pray for no rain this morning in church?
Woman #2: No, we just shook hands and congratulated ourselves on our own self-righteousness.
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: Amy
Guy coming out of bathroom: Dude, did you hear the angels singing?
Friend: What?
Guy: Man, that shit was magical.
Camp LeJeune, North Carolina
Girl #1: So I was talking to Ashley yesterday…
Girl #2: Which one?
Girl #1: Ashley, the lesbian who keeps trying to hook me up with gay guys.
Girl #2: Oh, Jewish Ashley!
Calgary
Alberta
Canadia
Man on cell: Behold, Beverly, my codpiece is enormous! Praise be to Jupiter!
Flagstaff, Arizona
Overheard by: Freezair
Classics professor: Yeah, Zeus liked to turn into animals in order to get some. Hey, I just study it; I don't justify it.
Memorial University
St. John's, Newfoundland
Canadia
Overheard by: Mel
Jock in business attire #1: Islamic golf carts.
Jock in business attire #2: Sick, dude. Sick.
Georgetown University
Washington, DC
Overheard by: taylor
Bible thumper pointing at chick: You're the master baiter!
University Quad
Illinois State
Overheard by: a fellow masterbater
White guy: So, is it true that when you die you go to heaven and get forty virgins to do whatever with?
Muslim guy: No, that's wrong. It's heaven: you get as many virgins as you want.
Liberty High School
Colorado Springs, Colorado
Sunday school teacher (showing picture of Good Shepherd): Who can tell me who this is?
Kid: That's Jesus with the whacker!
Teacher (puzzled): You mean he takes the sheep out for a walk?
Kid (pointing to the shepherd's crook): No, when one of the sheep tries to get away from Jesus, he whacks them with it so they won't go!
http://overheardintheward.blogspot.com/
