Chick, to teacher: Do you remember the Geto Boys, with the black dwarf who now raps for Jesus and got shot in the face by his girlfriend so now his eye is all slack?
Rest of class: … What?
High school classroom
Englewood, Colorado
Chick, to teacher: Do you remember the Geto Boys, with the black dwarf who now raps for Jesus and got shot in the face by his girlfriend so now his eye is all slack?
Rest of class: … What?
High school classroom
Englewood, Colorado
Student: What does ‘STP’ stand for?
Teacher: ‘Standard temperature and pressure.’ Also, ‘Stone Temple Pilots.’
Chemistry class
Provo, Utah
Student #1: Do you need this one?
Student #2: No, I have HIV — I just need herpes. [Several people turn and stare.] Powerpoints! I need the herpes powerpoint!
Copy room, Library, KU-Med
Kansas
Overheard by: Laughed Assless
Normal student: So, it looks like the five of us will go in the Honda Civic. The back seat will be a bit tight.
Skinny student: I’ll sit back there. I’m used to being packed in the back.
College dining hall
Georgia
Overheard by: Still remember
English student #1: Girl, don’t even tell me you was where you was, ’cause you wasn’t there!
English student #2: Foo’! Don’t be tellin’ me where I is and where I isn’t! I is where I is at!
927 Franklin Street
Iowa
Overheard by: grammer teachah
Student: Professor Barnes*, can you please explain where you got the last line there?
Professor: [Looks at blackboard, turns back to the class, and clasps his hands] It came from God.
University of Waterloo
Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: stopped going to class after this
Physics kid #1: I’m going to stab you in the jugular!
Physics kid #2: I once got hit in the jugular with a ping-pong ball…
Physics kid #1: My friend got hit by a car recently when he was running at night.
Physics kid #2: Wait, in the jugular?
overheardmost
Overheard by: http://overheardatcornell.blogspot.com/2007/04/long-time-no-update.html
Northeastern University girl: I’m so nervous about that Economics test…
Northeastern University guy: Oh, that? That class is so easy. You just have to go to class.
Northeastern University girl: See, if I go to class, I get confused and don’t get it, so I don’t bother going anymore.
39 bus
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: let me clue you in
Student #1: I gotta take Psychology next semester.
Student #2: Fuck no — too much reading.
Student #1: Sucks, man.
Student #2: Yeah, who cares if we all want to fuck our dads?
Student #1: Not me.
Student #2: Me either.
Men’s room, College
Farmington, Connecticut
Overheard by: hoppersitter
Professor: The Civil War actually brought along a lot of the standardized clothing measurements that we use today, though they were much more in-depth, such as inseam in relation to knuckle-width and things like that… And, of course, they measured penis size.
Student: Why?
Professor: Well, because it’s one of the things you can measure.
http://www.overheardatumbc.com
